“Dehydration is not something to cry about”
"Dehydration is not something to cry about" is a jocular one-line saying that was posted on Twitter on December 10, 2012. The saying was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on October 27, 2017.…
“The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran”
"The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran" is a jocular one-line saying that is frequently grouped with similar puns. "The man who survived…
“Body language is self explanatory”
"Body language is self explanatory, but most people don't use their eyes the way they should" was posted on Twitter on February 10, 2010, but it's not evident that a pun was…
“What is a ghost’s favorite party game?”/“Hide-and-go-shriek.”
A popular Halloween riddle on the game of "hide-and-seek" (or "hide-and-go-seek") is: Q: What is a ghost's favorite party game?A: Hide-and-go-shriek. The…
“Where do baby ghosts go during the day?”/“Dayscare centers.”
A baby ghost riddle is: Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?A: Dayscare centers. The popular Halloween riddle was posted on the newsgroup alt.folklore.ghost-stories on October 31, 1997.…
“If you are what you eat, then zombies are humans”
Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin (1755-1826), in the book Physiologie du Gout (1825), wrote "Tell me what you eat, and I shall tell you what you are," often interpreted as "you are what…
“I need glasses to see my family. Specifically, two glasses of Scotch”
"Glasses" can mean eyeglasses, but it can also mean drinking glasses. "I've been writing for 40min and my head is spinning already. I think I need glasses. two glasses. of…
“Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?”/“He didn’t have any guts.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A skeleton version is: Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?A:…
Cardinals (St. Louis baseball team in the National League)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: St. Louis CardinalsThe St. Louis Cardinals are an American professional baseball team based in St. Louis, Missouri. The Cardinals compete in Major League…
“Boomerangs are just frisbees for lonely people”
"Boomerangs are just frisbees for lonely people" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Both boomerangs and frisbees are thrown, but a boomerang can be returned without the…
“ATMs are pressed for cash”
The term "pressed for cash" -- needing money -- usually doesn't mean literal pressing, but a joke was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners pn October 26, 2017: "ATMs are pressed for…
“If you are what you eat, then zombies should be a lot smarter”
Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin (1755-1826), in the book Physiologie du Gout (1825), wrote "Tell me what you eat, and I shall tell you what you are," often interpreted as "you are what…
“Gyms are just tailors for birthday suits”
A gym has sometimes been called a tailor for a "birthday suit." " I'm 'bout to hit the gym and tailor my birthday suit" was posted on Twitter on May 12, 2010.…
“What did one keyboard say to the other keyboard?”/“Sorry, you’re not my type.”
A keyboard riddle is: Q: What did one keyboard say to the other keyboard?A: "Sorry, you're not my type." The joke has been cited in print since at least 2002. 23 February 2002, The…
“How do you make a violin sound like a viola?”/“Play in the low register with a lot of wrong notes.”
A viola joke is: Q: How do you make a violin sound like a viola?A: Play in the low register with a lot of wrong notes. The joke was posted on the newsgroup rec.humor on July 8, 1992. “How do you…
“Salt is just tasty rocks”
Do people eat rocks? "Salt is definitely a very tasty rock" was posted on Twitter on November 1, 2010. "It's weird to think salt is really tasty crushed up rock" was posted…
“What do frogs drink?”/“Hot croako.”
A frog riddle is: Q: What do frogs drink?A: Hot croako. The "hot croako"/"hot cocoa" joke was posted on the newsgroup sci.geo.geology on June 28, 2000. “What is a frog’s…
“What’s the difference between male spaghetti and female spaghetti?”/“Meatballs.”
A spaghetti riddle is: Q: What's the difference between male spaghetti and female spaghetti?A: Meatballs. "What do female spaghetti enjoy? Meatballs" was posted on Twitter on January…
“What’s the best kind of grass for your front yard?”/“Emo grass because it cuts itself.”
An “emo” joke has been told on several images: Q: What’s the best kind of grass for your front yard?A: Emo grass because it cuts itself. "Emo grass -- the grass that cuts itself"…
“Successful pianists know the key to success”
People often seek the key (or keys) to success. "Successful pianists know the key to success" is a joke that was posted on the website Pun of the Day on August 10, 2017. Other sayings…