“Sometimes you have to choose between planting roots and growing wings”
"Sometimes you have to choose between planting roots and growing wings" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "Should I stay or should I go?" is a…
“Every day thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians. Help end the violence. Eat bacon”
"Every day, thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians. Help end the violence. Eat bacon" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Every day, thousands…
“I choked on a carrot, and all I could think was ‘I bet a donut wouldn’t have done this’”
“I choked on a carrot this afternoon, and all I could think was 'I bet a donut wouldn’t have done this to me'" is a jocular food saying that has been printed on many images.…
“The road of life is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision”
"Be decisive. Right or wrong, make a decision. The road of life is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
Pour le Bois (sandwich) & Pourbois (unsupported “po’ boy” French etymologies)
It's sometimes stated that the "po' boy or "poor boy" sandwich of New Orleans, Louisiana, originated from the French "pour le bois" or "pourbois." There…
“It may not be PC to say this, but I like Apple products”
"PC" can stand for "politically correct" or "personal computer." "It may not be PC to say this but I like Apple products" is a joke that was posted on…
“Several upset thespian pigeons decided to stage a coo”
"Coup" sounds like "coo." "When the birds take over, do the pigeons stage a coo?" was prints in a 2009 book. "The pigeons and doves are planning to overthrow the…
Wi-Fried (Wi-Fi + fried)
"Wi-Fi" is a wireless networking technology. Many people people that Wi-Fi radiation is dangerous and have dubbed it "WiFry" (Wi-Fry) or "WhyFry" (Why-Fry). "Its…
“Did you hear about the musician who skipped a bar of silence? He was resisting a rest”
"Resisting arrest" sounds like "resisting a rest." "As I musician who refuses to pause my playing I was kicked out the band for resisting a rest" was posted on Twitter…
“Pigeon government overthrown. There’s been a coo”
"Coup" sounds like "coo." "When the birds take over, do the pigeons stage a coo?" was prints in a 2009 book. "The pigeons and doves are planning to overthrow the…
“Don’t bring up the past of a person who is trying to improve their future”
"Don't bring up the past of a person who is trying to improve their future" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that, for a person trying to overcome…
WiFry (WiFi + fry); WhyFry (WiFi + why + fry)
"Wi-Fi" is a wireless networking technology. Many people people that Wi-Fi radiation is dangerous and have dubbed it "WiFry" (Wi-Fry) or "WhyFry" (Why-Fry). "Its…
“If you work at a cemetery, every shift is a graveyard shift”
A "graveyard shift" is a night shift, such as one between midnight and 6 a.m. It does not necessarily involve a work shift at a cemetery, but there are jokes. "And for two summers, I…
“Sex is like pizza—even when it’s bad, you still have to pay for it”
“Pizza is like sex -- when it's good, it’s terrific, and when it's bad, it's still pretty good" is a saying that has been associated with Goldberg’s Pizza in New York…
Graveyard Shift
A "graveyard shift" is a night shift, usually between midnight and 6 a.m. There is no direct explanation of the origin of the term, but the darkness and quiet of night perhaps reminded…
“Waiting in traffic is like getting in line to go to work”
People often get stuck in traffic on the way to work. "Traffic is depressing. It's just waiting in line to go to work" was posted on Twitter by Jebb Sinclair on September 7, 2013.…
“What do you call a cook who becomes a lawyer?”/“A sue chef.”
A sous-chef de cuisine (French for “under-chef of the kitchen") shouldn’t be confused with a “sue” chef, but there are jokes. Some versions have it as when a cook becomes a lawyer,…
“What do you call a lawyer who becomes a cook?”/“A sue chef.”
A sous-chef de cuisine (French for “under-chef of the kitchen") shouldn’t be confused with a “sue” chef, but there are jokes. Some versions have it as when a cook becomes a lawyer,…
“Dad, are we pyromaniacs?”/“Yes, we arson.”
"Arson" sounds like "are son." A pun was posted on Reddit -- Dad Jokes on August 9, 2018: "Dad, are we pyromaniacs?"“Yes, we arson.” Reddit -- Dad JokesDad, are we…
“I used to be an expert in the Dunning-Kruger effect. Then I started to learn more about it”
The Dunning-Kruger effect describes a cognitive bias in which people of low ability assess their abilities to be greater than they actually are. There have been several jokes about it. "About…