“Hurry up and pass out the test before I forget everything!”
Many students study for a test, but then quickly forget everything. “Let's do the test before I forget everything" was published in a 1997 book. "Let's do this test before I…
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“You can trust a dog to guard your house, but never trust a dog to guard your sandwich”
Trust has its limits. "You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich" was posted on Twitter on November 20, 2012. "You can trust a dog to…
“‘The later I get here, the quicker this ends’ isn’t the right answer for ‘why are you late?’”
Some employees believe that the later they arrive to work, the sooner it's over. "My boss asked my why I was always late for work. I'm like, 'Cause it make the day go faster.…
“When police arrest a mentally unstable person, technically that qualifies as busting a nut”
"Busting a nut" means working very hard. "Bust" also means a police arrest, and "nut" also means a crazy person. "When cops catch a crazy person, that's…
Gumbo City (New Orleans nickname)
Gumbo was designated in 2004 as the official state cuisine of Louisiana. The city of New Orleans has sometimes been called the "Gumbo City," often used as a metaphor similar to…
“A good insurance company knows how to handle acclaim”
"Acclaim" sounds like "a claim." An insurance pun was posted on the website Pun of the Day in March 2000: "A good insurance company knows how to handle acclaim." Pun…
“The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it’s unfamiliar territory”
"The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Miss Stella Delaney was lost in…
“If your wife wants to learn to drive, don’t stand in her way”
"If your wife want to learn to drive, don't stand in her way" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "Warning: If your wife wants to learn to drive,…
“Money doesn’t make happiness. It buys it already made”
"Money can't buy happiness" is a proverb that has been cited in English since at least 1821. There have been many additions to the proverb. "Money doesn´t make happiness. It…
“How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he’s lost?”
The Bob Dylan song "Blowin' in the Wind" (1962) begins: "How many roads must a man walk downBefore you call him a man?" "How many roads must a man walk down before he…
“Why is it called ‘after dark’ when it really is ‘after light’?”
"Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?" is a one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The saying, along with other…
“Camping is nature’s way of promoting the motel business”
"Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that people who go camping will eventually want to stay…
“Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn’t find anyone to copy it from”
Many students copy the homework of others. "Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from" is a jocular school saying that has been printed on…
“I tried taking everything in life with a grain of salt. After using up two bags of salt I gave up”
To take something "with a grain of salt" is an expression meaning that one views it with skepticism. "I tried taking everything in life with a grain of salt, but after using up two…
“Don’t insult the alligator until after you cross the river”
"Don't insult the alligator until after you cross the river" -- that is, when the alligator can no longer harm you -- is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Until…
“This Valentine’s Day, I will almost certainly be inundated. Sorry. In, undated”
The word "inundated" is sometimes punned as "in, undated." "Ever since I joined one of those 'love match' sites I've been inundated. Sorry, that should have…
“After dinner, my wife asked me if I could clear the table. I needed a running start, but I made it”
To "clear the table" usually means to take away dinner plates, but a pun was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on April 14, 2017: "After dinner my wife asked me if I could clear the table. I…
“An expensive laxative will give you a run for your money”
"A run for one's money" is an old expression. A pun was posted on Twitter on September 17, 2014: "An expensive laxative will give you a run for your money!" "An…
“I think my smart phone is broken. I pressed the home button, but I’m still at school”
"I think my iPhone is broken. I pressed the home button and I'm still at work" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. "I keep pushing the 'home'…
“I think my smartphone is broken. I pressed the home button, but I’m still at work”
"I think my iPhone is broken. I pressed the home button and I'm still at work" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. "I keep pushing the 'home'…