“What did the paper say to the pencil?”/“Right on!”
A pencil riddle was printed in the Philadelphia (PA) Inquirer on October 16, 1940: Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: "I'm beginning to see the point." A different riddle…
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“Don’t chop me down! I’m a talking tree!”/“And you will dialogue.”
"Dialogue" sounds like "die a log," and there's a lumberjack pun. "'But, I’m a talking tree!' said the oak. 'And, you will dialogue,' replied the…
“Did you hear about the coin shortage? Apparently, America is literally out of common cents”
The 2019-2020 coronavirus pandemic resulted in a coin shortage in the United States. "The recent coin shortage shows us that we're all 'Missing common cents?'" -- a pun on…
“What did the clock say to the wristwatch?”/“I enjoyed tocking with you…”
"Tocking" can sound like "talking." A clock riddle was posted on Twitter by bear emoji on October 21, 2015: Q: What did the clock say to the other clock? A: "Nice tocking…
Quarantine 15 (weight gain)
"Freshman Fifteen" refers to fifteen pounds of weight gain that freshmen sometimes gain. Many people gained weight during the 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic and the subsequent quarantine.…
“Nepotism is frowned upon, but being ‘family owned and operated’ is celebrated”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterSparkles♥‿♥Sparkles@RoxxieMonoxideFolks proudly declare their businesses as being family owned and operated for decades as if nepotism is a good thing or…
Quarantine Fifteen (weight gain)
"Freshman Fifteen" refers to fifteen pounds of weight gain that freshmen sometimes gain. Many people gained weight during the 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic and the subsequent quarantine.…
“If a person wants to be atheistic it’s his God-given right to be an atheist”
Do atheists have God-given rights? "Yes, you have a God-given right to be an atheist in America" was printed in the Twin Falls (ID) Times-News on July 7, 1963. "It's my…
“What did the clock say to the other clock?”/“Nice tocking to ya.”
"Tocking" can sound like "talking." A clock riddle was posted on Twitter by bear emoji on October 21, 2015: Q: What did the clock say to the other clock? A: "Nice tocking…
“If you take a laptop computer for a run, you could jog your memory”
"If you take a laptop computer for a run, you could jog your memory" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on an image. The joke was posted on the website Pun of the Day in…
“Meet a new Monday and remember that happiness is a choice”
"Meet a new Monday and remember that happiness is a choice. You are as happy as you decide to be" is a Monday saying that has been printed on several images. "Meet a new Monday and…
“Dihydrogen monoxide is deliberately sprayed on organic crops”
"Dihydrogen monoxide is deliberately sprayed on organic crops" -- "dihydrogen monoxide" is water -- is a joke that has been printed on many images. "Dihydrogen monoxide is…
“Whomever stole my highlighter, I’ll find you. Mark my words”
"Mark my words" is an expression meaning that one should remember what the speak is saying. "Mark my words" usually does not involve literally marking words, but there are…
“Coffee…because I can count the number of hours I slept last night on one hand”
"Coffee...because I can count the number of hours I slept last night on one hand" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker needs the caffeine in coffee to stay…
“Never realized until today that Karl Marx’s sister, Onya, invented the starting pistol”
German philosopher, economist, historian, sociologist and political theorist Karl Marx (1818-1883) did not have a sister called "Onya Marx" ("on your marks," as said at the…
“Chocolate and vanilla are considered opposites because of their colors, not flavors”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Reddit -- ShowerthoughtsPosted by u/Shrek_inthe_mirror July 24, 2020Chocolate and vanilla are considered opposites because of their colours, not flavours
“Watermelons look like fat cucumbers”
Many people think that watermelons look like large cucumbers. "Watermelons look like fat cucumbers" was posted on Twitter by ✯αℓαnα✯ on July 6, 2012. "Watermelons look like…
“My brother ate a Rolex because I told him ‘watch his mouth’”
A Rolex is an expensive watch. "My brother ate a Rolex cause I told him 'watch his mouth'" is from a short rap video that was posted on Twitter by Girlhefunnyaf4 on September…
“I need a coffee, a vacation, and a bag full of cash. That’s all”
"I need a coffee, a vacation, and a bag full of cash. That's all" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I need a coffee, a vacation and a bag full of cash. Thats…
“What type of people never get angry?”/“The nomads.”
A riddle was printed in the Atlanta (GA) Journal-Constitution on January 18, 2005: Q: What do you call someone who never gets angry?A: A no-mad (nomad). "What type of people never get angry?…