“Teacher: Name a book that made you cry. Me: Organic Chemistry.”
Teachers like to recommend books that involve students emotionally. However, books that "make students cry" might not be the best recommendations. "She: What was the last book that…
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“Teacher: Name a book that made you cry. Me: Algebra.”
Teachers like to recommend books that involve students emotionally. However, books that "make students cry" might not be the best recommendations. "She: What was the last book that…
“Posted a photo of my clean house and it was flagged and removed as ‘fake news’”
"Posted a photo of my clean house and it was flagged and removed as 'fake news'" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. That is, it's fake that the house…
“I had the rudest, slowest, nastiest cashier today. It’s my own fault for using the self checkout”
People sometimes get rude cashiers at stores. This was posted on Facebook by Jim Shaver on December 3, 2020: "I had the rudest, slowest, nastiest cashier today. I guess it's my own fault…
“Nuts are tree eggs”
Nuts grow on trees, and many have called nuts "tree eggs." "Nuts are just hard to crack tree eggs" was posted on Twitter by April Younglove on May 5, 2008. "Nuts are just…
“For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, plus a social media overreaction”
"For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, plus a social media overreaction" (or "For every action, there is a social media overreaction") is a jocular saying…
“Don’t cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it”
"Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on an image on Facebook by Dr. Laura…
“Posted a photo of my clean house on Facebook and it was flagged as fake news”
"Posted a photo of my clean house and it was flagged and removed as 'fake news'" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. That is, it's fake that the house…
“Times are hard. A friend of mine had to get a second job as a butcher just to make meat ends”
To "make ends meet" is an expression meaning to have enough money to get by. A spoonerism pun was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on December 13, 2020: "Times are hard. A friend of mine…
“Fruit is just tree eggs”
Fruit grows on trees, and many have called fruit "tree eggs." "Fruit is really just tree eggs" was posted on Twitter by David Wester on January 3, 2012. "If you think about…
“Fruits are just tree eggs”
Fruit grows on trees, and many have called fruit "tree eggs." "Fruit is really just tree eggs" was posted on Twitter by David Wester on January 3, 2012. "If you think about…
“When I applied for shift work, I didn’t realize the ‘F’ was silent”
"Shift work" is sometimes called "shit work." "Shift Work... The 'f' Is Silent" was posted on Twitter by Gage Findlater on February 25, 2013. "When I…
“If your crush gets Covid, propose to her. She might say yes due to lack of taste”
The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic caused sufferers to have an absence of taste. Of course, there were some "lack of taste" jokes. "If your crush gets Covid, it's the right…
“He’s making a list, chicken and rice…”
"Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town" (1934) is a popular Christmas song, but not everyone knows the lyrics. "He's making a list and checking it twice" is sometimes given…
“Marriage should be between a person who hates pickles and another person who will eat that pickle”
Some people do not like pickles (often added to a hamburger), and it's helpful if there is a family member who eats them. "Call me old-fashioned, but I believe marriage should be between…
“Over 40—we did all our stupid stuff before the invention of the internet, so there’s no proof”
"The best thing about being over 40/50/60 is that we did all our stupid stuff before the invention of the internet, so there's no proof" is a jocular saying that has been printed on…
“Over 60—we did all our stupid stuff before the invention of the internet, so there’s no proof”
"The best thing about being over 40/50/60 is that we did all our stupid stuff before the invention of the internet, so there's no proof" is a jocular saying that has been printed on…
Kissmyasserole (kiss my ass + casserole)
Entry in progress -- BP Wikipedia: CasseroleA casserole (French: diminutive of casse, from Provençal cassa 'pan') is a variety of a large, deep pan or bowl, typically with a glass lid,…
“Ceiling fans are just helicopter blades that didn’t study hard enough”
Ceiling fans are sometimes compared to helicopter blades. "Ceiling fans are just helicopter blades that didn't study hard enough... Via @sixthformpoet" was posted on Twitter by…
“Ceiling fans are really just helicopters who gave up on their dreams and opted for an office job”
Ceiling fans are sometimes compared to helicopter blades. "Ceiling fans are just helicopter blades that didn't study hard enough... Via @sixthformpoet" was posted on Twitter by…