“People who buy sex dolls are fucking dummies”
"Whoever called them Sex Dolls and not Fucking Dummies is a fucking dummy" is a joke that was posting on Twitter by Mischievous Mike on May 31, 2016. "I should just buy myself one of…
“People who complain about the way the ball bounces usually dropped it”
"People who complain about the way the ball bounces usually dropped it" (that is, people who complain about something that is messed-up often caused the mess) is a popular saying.…
“People who pay, pay attention”
When people get stuff for free, they often don't care as much as someone who had to pay for the same thing. "Those who pay taxes pay attention" was printed in The Times (Shreveport,…
“People who think by the inch and talk by the yard deserve to be kicked by the foot”
"People who think by the inch and talk by the yard deserve to be kicked by the foot" is a jocular saying that appears to have developed in two parts. "Some men and women talk by the…
“People who used to be late and blamed it on traffic are still late to their Zoom meetings”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to work at home, through Zoom meetings. "People who used to be late and blamed it on traffic are still late to their zoom meetings"…
“Pets: Life’s apology for every bad day ever”
"Pets: Life’s apology for every crappy day ever" is a saying that has been printed on many images. People come home after a bad day at work (or school) and are greeted by their pets.…
“Pets: Life’s apology for every crappy day ever”
"Pets: Life’s apology for every crappy day ever" is a saying that has been printed on many images. People come home after a bad day at work (or school) and are greeted by their pets.…
“Pets: Life’s apology for every crummy day ever”
"Pets: Life’s apology for every crappy day ever" is a saying that has been printed on many images. People come home after a bad day at work (or school) and are greeted by their pets.…
“Pickup line to use at the hairdresser: ‘So, do you comb hair often?’”
"Do you comb hair often?" (a pun of "Do you come here often?") was posted on the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on November 19, 2000. "Do you comb hair often? @pokehq…
“Pile it high and watch it fly” (merchandising adage)
"Pile/Stack it/them/'em high, sell it/them/'em cheap" was a motto of Jack Cohen (1898-1979), a British businessman who founded the Tesco supermarket chain. "Pile 'em…
“Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow”
"Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on the newsgroup bit.listserv.os2-l on August 15, 1997. Authorship is…
“Planners are a funny lot. They carry neither sword nor pistol…”
A rhyme about planners has been cited in print since at least 1959: Planners are a curious lot, They wear not sword nor pistol. They walk stooped over -- never trot, Because their balls are…
“Please be patient with me. I’m from the 1900s”
"Please be patient with me. I'm from the 1900s" is a jocular saying that began in the 2020s. The speaker is over 20 or 30 years old and cannot process new technology easily.…
“Please be patient. I’m screwing things up as fast as I can”
"Please be patient. I'm screwing things up as fast as I can" is a jocular one-line work saying that has been printed on several images. "Hey guys..please be patient. I'm…
“Please help me I’m trapped. In a Haiku factory. Save me before they”
A haiku joke has been printed on many images: "help me, i am trappedin a haiku factorysave me, before they" The haiku was posted on tumblr by r0wdyruff in December 2012. "Help!…
“Please lower the cost of groceries. I’m not built for OnlyFans”
"Please lower the gas prices. I'm not built for OnlyFans" and "Please lower the cost of living. I'm not built for OnlyFans" are jocular sayings that have been printed…
“Please lower the cost of living. I’m not built for OnlyFans”
"Please lower the gas prices. I'm not built for OnlyFans" and "Please lower the cost of living. I'm not built for OnlyFans" are jocular sayings that have been printed…
“Please lower the gas prices. I’m not built for OnlyFans”
"Please lower the gas prices. I'm not built for OnlyFans" and "Please lower the cost of living. I'm not built for OnlyFans" are jocular sayings that have been printed…
“Please stop the hate on the lazy people. They didn’t do anything at all”
"Why we hate lazy people? they are not doing anything anyway" is a question that was asked on Twitter by DearDiary on June 4, 2019. "Why is everyone mad at lazy people? They’re not…
“Porn is the only industry where having sex with your coworkers is encouraged”
"PSA DONT have sex with your co-workers....unless you do porn!!" is a jocular line that was posted on Twitter on February 1, 2012. "My porn career was over really fast when I…