“When action meets compassion, lives change”
"When action meets compassion, lives change" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. The slogan has been used in efforts to help the poor and the sick, and in…
“When all else fails, read the instructions”
"When all else fails, read the instructions" is a jocular line that has been cited in print since at least 1954, when it was applied to an automatice food dispensing machine. "If all…
“When checking out at the store, ask your checkout person what kind of candy bar they like and buy them one…”
Stores usually sell candy at the checkout line, and there's a joke about this. "When checking out at the store, ask your checkout person what kind of candy bar they like and buy them one.…
“When Christianity came to America, it became a business”
Dr. Richard C. Halverson (1916-1995), chaplain to the U.S. Senate, was credited in 1984 for a speech before the General Assembly of the Presbyterian Church: "In the beginning the church was a…
“When Dracula shops online, he keeps clicking ‘Your Account’”
"Your account" shouldn't be confused with "You're a Count," but there are several Count Dracula puns. "RT @GaryDelaney: I bet Dracula does all his shopping…
“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that an airplane takes off against wind”
"The Country Parson" comic strip, by Frank A. Clark, from September 6, 1955, said: "When everything seems to be goin' against you, remember that the airplane takes off against…
“When I applied for shift work, I didn’t realize the ‘F’ was silent”
"Shift work" is sometimes called "shit work." "Shift Work... The 'f' Is Silent" was posted on Twitter by Gage Findlater on February 25, 2013. "When I…
“When I asked a taxidermist what she did for a living, she replied with ‘You know, stuff’”
When asked what one does, "stuff" is a non-specific answer, but suppose one really does "stuff" for a living? "'Oh, you know, 'stuff'' ~ a taxidermist,…
“When I be late to work, I walk in fake mad”
If you're late for work, don't walk in with a smile on your face. Look angry or mad, as if the traffic, or a delayed bus or train, or something else held you back from that wonderful work…
“When I die, I want the people I did group projects with to lower me into my grave” (joke)
"When I die, I want (X) to be my pallbearers so they can let me down one last time" is a popular meme on many images. That 'X" is often a sports player or sports team. "I…
“When I have to fill out a form asking who to call in case of an emergency, I always write an ambulance…”
Many forms ask who to call in case of an emergency. "Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, 'An…
“When I hear somebody sigh that ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’”
"When I hear somebody sigh that 'Life is hard,' I am always tempted to ask, 'Compared to what?'" is a jocular line about life's troubles that has been printed on…
“When I open my first business, I’m only hiring trans women. Men’s strength, Women’s wages”
"When I open my first business, I'm only hiring trans women. Men's strength, Women's wages" is a joke that has been printed on many images. Authorship of the meme is…
“When I order Amazon chicken pellets, I get an email a few days later asking for their feed back!”
"Feedback" should not be confused with "feed back," but there are puns. This joke was posted on Sickipedia on August 15, 2019: "I've had it with Amazon. Every time I…
“When I say ‘I’ll figure it out’ I mean I’ll just adapt to whatever new level of hell is coming”
People often say "I'll figure it out" when they see something new. This was posted on X/Twitter by Mike Primavera on July 12, 2023: "When I say 'I'll figure it…
“When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance”
Several businesses require pay in advance. A popular 1915 joke involves a doctor: She -- I saw the doctor today about my loss of memory.He -- What did he do?She -- Made me pay in advance. -- London…
“When I was young, I was poor. But after years of hard, honest work, I’m no longer young”
"When I was young, I was poor. But after years of hard, honest work, I'm happy to inform I'm no longer young" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When I’m at work it’s sunny and nice, after work, cold and raining”
Sometimes it seems that good weather is wasted when one is working. "When I'm at work it's sunny and nice, after work, cold and raining" was posted on Twitter by FUNNY TWEETS on…
“When in doubt, make it stout” (mechanical engineering adage)
"When in doubt, make it stout" is a mechanical engineering adage that has been printed on many images. It's not known where the saying originated. "When in doubt, make it…
“When is the employee Christmas party for self-check at Walmart?”
Many people who do self-checkout at a store such as Walmart feel like they are working there -- and deserve an employee Christmas party. "When is the Employee Christmas Party for Self-Check at…