“My body only fights off illness on Saturday and Sunday. I have a weekend immune system”
"Weakened immune system" shouldn't be confused with "weekend immune system," but there are jokes. "I'm intrigued by the 'weekend immune system'. Does…
“My brother ate a Rolex because I told him ‘watch his mouth’”
A Rolex is an expensive watch. "My brother ate a Rolex cause I told him 'watch his mouth'" is from a short rap video that was posted on Twitter by Girlhefunnyaf4 on September…
“My favorite color is October”
"My favorite color is October" is a seasonal saying that has been printed on many images. Fall foliage can display many different colors. "Photo: October is my favorite color :D…
“My favorite holiday is Saturday”
"My favorite holiday is Saturday" is a Saturday saying that has been printed on many images. "My favorite holiday is Saturday" (shown on an ecard by Someecards) was posted on…
“My favorite outdoor activity is the short walk back inside”
"My favorite outdoor activity is the short walk back inside" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker doe not enjoy exercise, and the outside weather is too…
“My favorite part of fall is when the mosquitoes go back to Hell”
"My favorite part of fall is when the mosquitoes go back to Hell" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I love fall! My favorite part is not when it gets cold,…
“My favorite time of the year is when the bugs start to die”
"My favorite time of the year is when (all) the bugs start to die" is a jocular fall saying that has been printed on many images. "my favorite time of year is when all the bugs start…
“My head gets cold at the drop of a hat”
"At the drop of a hat" means without hesitation (instantly). The phrase usually does not literally involve a hat, but there are jokes. "My head gets cold at the drop of a hat"…
“My New Year’s resolution is 1080p”
"My New Year's resolution is 1080p is a jocuar New Year's one-line saying that has been printed on several images. 1080p is the resolution for high-definition television (HDTV).…
“My New Year’s resolution is to not have one”
"My New Year's resolution is to not have one" is said by many people who know that they won't keep their resolutions. "New year’s resolution is not to have one" was…
“My New Year’s resolution is to procrastinate. I’ll start tomorrow”
"My New Year's resolution is to procrastinate. I'll start tomorrow" is a joke that has been printed on many images. "My new years resolution is to procrastinate less and be…
“My New Year’s resolution is to stop putting my foot in my mouth. I bet yours is to lose weight”
"My New Year's resolution is to stop putting my foot in my mouth. I bet yours is to lose weight, huh?" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. The speaker is…
“My new year’s revolution is to learn how to spell”
People make new year's resolutions, but this is sometimes misspelled as "revolutions." "My New Year's revolution is to always spell important words correctly, thus…
“My New Year’s revolution is to proofread more”
"Resolution" is sometimes mis-typed as "revolution." "My new year's revolution is to proofread my tweets more carefully" was posted on Twitter on December 27,…
“My new years revolution is to learn how to spell”
People make new year's resolutions, but this is sometimes misspelled as "revolutions." "My New Year's revolution is to always spell important words correctly, thus…
“My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday”
"My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday" is a weekend saying that has been printed on many images. "My saturday was going really nicely until i realised it…
“My son identifies as a crescent moon. I’m worried, but my wife says it’s just a phase”
A moon joke was posted on Twitter on September 15, 2016: "I sexually identify as a moon. My mom thinks it's just a phase." A slightly different version was posted on Reddit -- Jokes…
“My time machine is the best thing till sliced bread”
"The best/greatest thing since sliced bread" is a popular phrase. “What was the greatest thing before sliced bread?” is a question that's sometimes asked, and there is a time…
“My time machine is the best thing untill sliced bread”
"The best/greatest thing since sliced bread" is a popular phrase. “What was the greatest thing before sliced bread?” is a question that's sometimes asked, and there is a time…
“My uncle named his dogs Rolex and Timex. They are his watch dogs”
A joke has it that a person named two dogs "Timex" and "Rolex" because they were "watch dogs." The "watchdog" pun has been cited in print since at least…