"I have two reactions when I leave the house: 1. Ew, the weather. 2. Ew, the people" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "I have two reactions when I leave…
"I haven't been so/this excited about Friday since last Friday" (or "I haven't been this excited about a Friday, since last Friday") is a Friday saying that has been…
"I haven't been so/this excited about Friday since last Friday" (or "I haven't been this excited about a Friday, since last Friday") is a Friday saying that has been…
"For I don't know how long" is an expression for a long period of time, but there's a joke: "I haven't owned a watch for I don't know how long." The joke was…
A cuckoo clock often features a figure that comes out of a house to strike the hour. A cuckoo clock joke was posted on Twitter on December 10, 2010: "I've got a job working in a full size…
"Since I'm going in different time zones and am gaining hours, does that make me a time traveler?" was posted on Twitter on March 29, 2015. "If I keep traveling to different…
"Friday just called. She'll be here tomorrow and she's bringing the wine!" is a Thursday saying that has been printed on many images. " RT @MichaelJordaan: Just got off the…
"THERE seems to be a particular reason why the month of May should be marked with floods, unless it be the old rule that the month is so called because it may rain, it may snow, it may freeze,…
"'Save the date!' It turns out that this admonition is not, as might reasonably be supposed, a charity solicitation on behalf of an endangered fruit" was printed in the Chicago…
Many people doubt "global warming" after a big or a late snowfall. "I just shoveled X inches of global warming off my driveway/sidewalk" is a popular trope. "Having just…
People usually try to get in shape for the summer, when the weather is warmer and they will be wearing less clothing. "You knew summer was coming and you just kept eating" (or "You…
"I know a lot of very clever jokes about umbrellas, but they usually go over peoples heads" was posted on Twitter by BIG_BEAR_F1 on September 7, 2010. "I know a lot of…
"I know a lot of very clever jokes about umbrellas, but they usually go over peoples heads" was posted on Twitter by BIG_BEAR_F1 on September 7, 2010. "I know a lot of…
"I know a lot of very clever jokes about umbrellas, but they usually go over peoples heads" was posted on Twitter by BIG_BEAR_F1 on September 7, 2010. "I know a lot of…
"Big time" usually means "a lot," but a pun has been cited in print since at least 2015: "I let my friend borrow my grandfather clock. He owes me big time." Wikipedia:…
"I live for my alarm clock collection. It's what gets me up in the morning" is a jocular saying that was posted on Twitter on February 10, 2011. The saying was posted on Twitter by…
"I love fall most of all" is a seasonal saying that has been printed on many images. "I love Fall most of all!" was posted on Twitter by DeWayne in SD on October 13, 2009.…
People who were never going to leave the house anyway don't care about bad weather. This was posted on Twitter by Jonathan Edward Durham on January 8, 2023: "I love it when the weather…
American comedian Garry Shandling (1949-2016) told a joke on a comedy special in 1989: ''I made love for an hour and 15 minutes. Well, it was on the day you push the clocks ahead."…
A joke has a person enter a clock store (or a battery store): Customer: I need a battery so I can tell the time.Employee: Is it for a clock?Customer: I don't know! That's why I need a…