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October 11, 2020
Transportation

“Why are you staring at my bumper sticker?” (bumper sticker)

"Why are you staring at my bumper (sticker)?" is a bumper sticker saying that has been printed on many images. "Why are you staring at my bumper sticker?" was printed in the…

October 11, 2020
Transportation

“Why are you staring at my bumper? You pervert!” (bumper sticker)

"Why are you staring at my bumper (sticker)?" is a bumper sticker saying that has been printed on many images. "Why are you staring at my bumper sticker?" was printed in the…

May 8, 2016
Food/Drink

“Why aren’t bananas ever lonely?”/“Because they come in bunches.”

A joke about bananas is: Q: Why aren't bananas ever lonely?A: Because they come in bunches. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1966. 16 January 1966, The Register (Santa Ana, CA),…

January 8, 2025
Food/DrinkPets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Why aren’t dogs allowed in bars?”/“Because they can’t hold their licker.”

"Liquor" shouldn't be confused with "licker," but there are jokes. "Q. Why don't they allow dogs in bars? A. Because most of them can't hold their licker!…

November 15, 2022
Food/Drink

“Why aren’t donut holes called don’tnuts?”

"Donuts" are not "do nuts," but some people think there should be "donotnuts" or "don'tnuts" (for "do not nuts" or "don't…

June 22, 2018
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“Why aren’t there more songs about being hungry?”

There have been many songs about love, but what about food? "I think falling in/being in/falling out of love has been pretty well documented. Why aren't there more songs about being…

June 22, 2018
Food/Drink

“Why aren’t there more songs about being hungry?”

There have been many songs about love, but what about food? "I think falling in/being in/falling out of love has been pretty well documented. Why aren't there more songs about being…

January 8, 2025
Food/DrinkPets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Why aren’t dogs allowed in bars?”/“Because they cant control their licker.”

"Liquor" shouldn't be confused with "licker," but there are jokes. "Q. Why don't they allow dogs in bars? A. Because most of them can't hold their licker!…

January 8, 2025
Food/DrinkPets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Why aren’t dogs allowed in pubs?”/“Because they can’t control their licker.”

"Liquor" shouldn't be confused with "licker," but there are jokes. "Q. Why don't they allow dogs in bars? A. Because most of them can't hold their licker!…

January 10, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“Why argue with a Vaxxer, when you could just wait?”

The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in vaccines; some people thought these vaccines would kill the virus, while others thought that the vaccines themselves were more dangerous. "Why…

January 10, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“Why argue with an Anti-Vaxer, when you could just wait”

The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in vaccines; some people thought these vaccines would kill the virus, while others thought that the vaccines themselves were more dangerous. "Why…

November 26, 2024
Buildings/Housing/ParksWork/Businesses

“Why bills never go on sale? Like rent 50% off or buy 1 light bill and get the gas bill free”

"Why bills never go on sale? Like rent 50% off or buy 1 light bill and get the gas bill free" and "How come bills never go on sale? Like rent 25% off or pay 2 electricity bills and…

September 25, 2015
Transportation

“Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel”

A popular story about New York Yankees catcher Yogi Berra (1925-2015) is from 1950, when the team was on a road trip. Another teammate took a look at Yogi's shabby bag and suggested that he…

March 29, 2009
Food/Drink

“Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?”

"Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" (or, "Why buy a cow when the milk's so cheap?") means that you needn't buy something when it's being offered…

February 3, 2020
Food/Drink

“Why call it a land dispute, and not ground beef?”

"Overheard in the @KBOITV newsroom: 'Could a land dispute also be called ground beef?' -- @JakeLeberKBOI" is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Brent Hunsaker on January 11,…

July 13, 2020
Food/Drink

“Why can you never trust a fruit over a vegetable?”/“Because they’re seedy.”

"Seedy" has a double meaning, and there are several food jokes. "Why does your mom disapprove of sesame bagels? because they're seedy" was posted on Twitter by arleigh on…

July 3, 2020
Buildings/Housing/Parks

“Why can’t 45 degree angles get a mortgage?”/“They don’t know whether to sine or cosine.”

"Sine" and "cosine" have nothing to do with "sign" and "cosign" (as with a mortgage), but there are jokes. "Whenever they said 'sine' I just…

November 26, 2016
Names/Phrases

“Why can’t a man living in New York be buried in Chicago?” (riddle)

A New York City riddle is: Q: Why can't a man living in New York be buried in Chicago?A: Because he's still living! The riddle was posted on Twitter on February 3, 2012.…

February 14, 2017
Education/Schools

“Why can’t atheists solve exponential equations?”/“Because they don’t believe in higher powers.”

An atheist pun about "higher powers" is: Q: Why can't atheists solve exponential equations?A: Because they don't believe in higher powers. The math joke was posted on Twitter on…

July 25, 2018
Sports/Games

“Why can’t cars play football?”/“Because they only have one boot.”

A UK riddle about football (soccer) is: Q: Why can't cars play football?A: Because they only have one boot. A car's "boot" is its "trunk" (US). A person's boot is…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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