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November 22, 2019
Buildings/Housing/Parks

“What did the real estate agent say to the other agent?”/”‘House’ it going?”

"House" sounds like "how's." A realtor (real estate agent) riddle is: Q: What did the real estate agent say to the other agent?A: "House it going?" "RT…

August 16, 2020
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“What did the right knee say to the left knee?”/“Hi, felony!”

"Felony" sounds a bit like "fellow knee" or "fella knee." "What did the right knee say to the left knee? Hi...felony!" was posted on Twitter by Justin on…

March 1, 2022
Food/Drink

“What did the Romaine Catholic say?”/“Lettuce pray.”

"Romaine Catholic" (romaine = Roman Catholic) and "lettuce pray" ("let us pray") are connected puns. "Lettuce Pray (...) Is that the Romaine Catholic…

December 28, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“What did the router say to the doctor?”/“It hurts when IP.”

Internet Protocol (IP) sounds like "I pee," and, of course, there are jokes. "What Did The Modem Say To The Doctor When He Wasnt Feeling Well?: It hurts when IP" was posted on…

April 16, 2016
Food/Drink

“What did the salt say to the pepper?”/“Hey. what’s shaking?”

A joke about salt and pepper shskers is: Q: What did the salt say to the pepper?A: Hey, what's shaking? The food joke has been cited in print since at least 1970. “What did the salt say to…

April 19, 2016
Food/Drink

“What did the salt say to the pepper?”/“Season’s greetings.”

A joke about salt and pepper shskers is: Q: What did the salt say to the pepper?A: Season's greetings. The food joke has been cited in print since at least 1995. “What did the salt say to…

March 23, 2018
Food/Drink

“What did the sandwich say to the doorman?”/“Please lettuce in.”

A sandwich riddle was posted on Reddit -- Badjokes on September 12, 2017: Q: What did the sandwich say to the doorman?A: "Please lettuce in." "Lettuce" sounds like "let…

April 3, 2018
Buildings/Housing/Parks

“What did the sandwich say to the doorman?”/“Please lettuce in.”

A sandwich riddle was posted on Reddit -- Badjokes on September 12, 2017: Q: What did the sandwich say to the doorman?A: "Please lettuce in." "Lettuce" sounds like "let…

August 13, 2021
Food/Drink

“What did the Scotsman say when he didn’t have money for his hors d’oeuvre bill?”/“I canape.”

"Canapé" can sound like "can not pay." "What did the Scotsman say when he didn’t have the money for his Hors d'oeuvre bill? I canapé" was posted on Twitter by…

July 12, 2023
Food/Drink

“What did the shark bring to the party?”/“A sharkuterie board.”

"Charcuterie" has nothing to do with sharks, but the mostly jocular term "sharkcuterie" or "sharkuterie" (charcuterie for sharks, or containing shark meat) is…

December 18, 2017
Time/Weather

“What did the sheep say to the shepherd?”/“Season’s bleatings!”

People say "Season's Greetings!" at the end of the year. A sheep riddle was printed in 1993: "QUESTION: What do sheep say at Christmas? ANSWER: Season's Bleatings." A…

January 1, 2018
Food/Drink

“What did the shoe say to the gum?”/“Stick with me and we’ll go places.”

A gum riddle is: Q: What did the shoe say to the gum?A: "Stick with me and we'll go places." The joke has been cited in print since at least 1987. 27 December 1987, Arkansas Democrat…

April 15, 2021
Food/Drink

“What did the sleepy dragon order at the fancy steakhouse?”/“Flaming yawn.”

"Filet mignon" can sound like "flamin' yawn," and there are jokes. "What's a tired dragons favorite steak? Sarah: Flamin'yawn! (filet mignon)" was…

December 4, 2017
Food/Drink

“What did the snowman say to the aggressive carrot?”/“Get out of my face.”

A snowman often has a carrot for a nose. A riddle is: Q: What did the snowman say to the aggressive carrot?A: "Get out of my face." The riddle was posted on Twitter on October 13, 2014.…

October 29, 2020
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“What did the sound engineer say on his last day of work?”/“Audios.”

"Adios" (Spanish for "goodbye") should not be confused with "audios," but there are jokes. This riddle was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on October 27, 2020: Q: What…

July 10, 2018
Food/Drink

“What did the spaghetti say to the other spaghetti?”/“Pasta la vista, baby!”

A pasta riddle is: Q: What did the spaghetti say to the other spaghetti?A: "Pasta la vista, baby!" "Pasta la vista" is a portmanteau of "pasta" and "hasta la…

September 1, 2017
Education/Schools

“What did the suicide bomber teacher say to his students?”/“I’m only going to show this once.”

Teachers often say, "Pay attention! I'm only going to do this once!" But what if the teacher is instructing suicide bombers? A joke was posted on the newsgroup soc.culture.israel on…

March 18, 2016
Food/Drink

“What did the sushi say to the bee?”/“Wasabi.”

A popular pun involving the word "wasabi" is: Q: What did the sushi say to be bee?A: Wasabi (What's up, bee). The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Wikipedia:…

October 7, 2021
Food/Drink

“What did the tectonic plates have for breakfast?”/“Panquakes.”

"Panquake" (pan/pancake + earthquake) is a jocular term from "pancake." "Frisco Breakfast: Panquakes and syrup" was printed in the Miami (FL) News on August 7, 1979.…

May 13, 2021
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“What did the Terminator say after he got his coffee?”/“Hasta barista, baby.”

"Hasta la vista, baby" is a famous line that actor Arnold Schwarzenegger used in the film Terminator 2: Judgment Day. "Hasta barista, baby" is a line that has been printed on…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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