“A salad without radicchio? That’s just radicchio-less”
Radicchio (a perennial cultivated form of leaf chicory) appears in many jokes as "radicchio-less" (ridiculous). "It's all the talk about salad-masochism, peas-ophilia, and…
“A salt truck implies the existence of a pepper truck”
There are salt trucks to salt the roads, but there are no pepper trucks. "i've seen a lot of salt trucks just wondering where are the pepper trucks" was posted on Twitter by Darren…
“A sandwich is an unsuccessful attempt to make both ends meat”
"A sandwich is an unsuccessful attempt to make both ends meat" is a popular sandwich pun. "It is very hard to make both ends meat -- especially of a pic-nic sandwich" was…
“A saxophone is like a lawsuit. Everyone is happy when the case is closed.”
A music joke was posted on the newsgroup wny.events on February 2, 1997: Q: Why is a viola like a lawsuit?A: Everyone is happy when the case is closed. The joke has been told about other…
“A scared nickel never made a dime” (business adage)
"Scared money never wins" is an old gambling adage. "A scared nickel never made a dime" is a business adage. If someone is unwilling to risk a little, then one won't win a…
“A schlemiel is the guy who spills soup. A schlimazel is the guy he spills it on”
There is a classic explanation of the Yiddish terms "schlemiel" and "schlimazel": "A schlemiel is the guy who spills soup. A schlimazel is the guy he spills it on." A…
“A science teacher had his students observe and report on the condensation…” (joke)
"Due" shouldn't be confused with "dew," but there are jokes. This was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on May 21, 2022: "A science teacher had his students observe and…
“A screwdriver walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A screwdriver version is: "A screwdriver walks into a bar. The bartender says,…
“A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student”
"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student" is an old line of unknown authorship. "He (Charles Haddon Spurgeon -- ed.) is a self-taught man, and contrary to…
“A selfie with a celebrity is the new form of an autograph”
People used to ask celebrities for autographs, but now, they ask celebrities to be in their selfies. "The new form of asking for an autograph is 'can i get a selfie?'" was…
“A semicolon broke the law; it was given two consecutive sentences”
A semicolon riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on January 24, 2016: Q: What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?A: It was given two consecutive sentences. A different form of the joke…
“A shady business never yields a sunny life”
"A shady business never yields a sunny life" was printed in Forbes Epigrams: 1000 Thoughts on Life and Business (1922) by B. C. Forbes, the founder of Forbes magazine. It became one of…
“A sheep, a drum and a snake fall off a cliff. Ba-Dum-Tss”
The rimshot became famous as a drummer's support of a comedian after a (usually bad or unusually corny) joke. The drum sounds are written as "boom boom" and "ba dum tss."…
“A sheep, a drum and a snake walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
The rimshot became famous as a drummer's support of a comedian after a (usually bad or unusually corny) joke. The drum sounds are written as "boom boom" and "ba dum tss."…
“A ship does not sail with yesterday’s wind” (political proverb)
Wisconsin Congressman Paul Ryan accepted the Republican National Convention's nomination for vice president in August 2012, pointing out failures of the incumbent Democratic administration…
“A sign for a strip club during the day: ‘Sorry, we’re clothed’”
"Sorry, we're clothed" -- a pun on the popular "Sorry, we're closed" sign -- has been printed on many images. "On the door of a Los Angeles strip joint, after a…
“A sign said ‘Lobster Tails $2.’ I paid $2 and was told, ‘Once upon a time there was a lobster…’”
"Lobster tails" shouldn't be confused with "lobster tales," but there are jokes. "Once upon a time there was a lobster… #lobstertales" was posted on Twitter by…
“A signature reveals a man’s character—and sometimes even his name”
"A signature always reveals a man's character — and sometimes even his name" is a jocular line that has been credited to humorist and author Evan Esar (1899-1995), who included it…
“A simile walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A simile version is: "A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert." "A…
“A single bee is ignored, but when millions come together, even the bravest run in fear”
“A single bee is ignored, but when millions come together, even the bravest run in fear. The one thing the government fears is the day we stand together” is a saying that has been printed on…