“The early bird can have the worm. I’ll take coffee”
"The early bird gets the worm" is a proverb dating from at least the 17th century. It means that whoever does something first has the best chance of success. However, most people want an…
“The early bird can have the worm. Just give me my coffee”
"The early bird gets the worm" is a proverb dating from at least the 17th century. It means that whoever does something first has the best chance of success. However, most people want an…
“The early bird can have the worm. Worms are gross and I prefer coffee”
"The early bird gets the worm" is a proverb dating from at least the 17th century. It means that whoever does something first has the best chance of success. However, most people want an…
“The early bird makes the coffee”
"The early bird catches the worm” is a proverb dating from at least the 17th century; it means that whoever does something first has the best chance of success. "The early bird makes…
“The Earth is 70% uncarbonated water. Therefore the Earth is flat”
There is carbonated water and there is non-carbonated water, sometimes called "flat" water. This plays into a flat earth joke. "If the earth is 71% water and it's not…
“The easiest way to avoid a hangover is to just stay drunk”
"The best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk" is a jocular statement that is sometimes credited to American writer Dorothy Parker (1893-1967). There's no evidence that she said…
“The egg is to cuisine what the article is to speech”
"'The egg,' wrote a French gourmet of this century, 'is to the cuisine what the article is to speech,'" wrote Waverley Root in his book, Food: An authoritative and…
“The Elderberry is the oldest of all berries and you must respect it!”
"Elderberry" sounds like "elder berry," and some people assume it's older and wiser than other berries. "Is elderberry the wisest of all berries?" was posted on…
“The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries”
"Elderberry" sounds like "elder berry," and some people assume it's older and wiser than other berries. "Is elderberry the wisest of all berries?" was posted on…
“The exact defense chili developed to preserve the species is the exact reason they are devoured”
A saying about the heat of chili peppers was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on August 19, 2017: "Chili peppers must be pretty pissed. The exact defense they developed to preserve the…
“The existence of a gravy boat and a gravy train implies an entire gravy transportation system. Why isn’t anyone talking about this?”
A "gravy boat" is a sauce boat. A "gravy train" is a source of easy money. There are jokes about "gravy transportation." "There's a gravy boat and a gravy…
“The existence of cardamom implies the existence of envelopeadad”
Cardamom can sound like "card-a-mom." Is "card-a-dad" its opposite? "Cardamom implies the existence of a cardadad" was posted on Twitter by ⊰TJ Berry⊱ on November…
“The existence of pizza pockets implies the existence of pizza pants”
There are "pizza pockets" (such as a calzone), but there are no "pizza pants." "question from a little kid: if they have pizza pockets, why don't they have pizza…
“The existence of smoothies implies the existence of roughies”
There are "smoothies," but no "roughies." "A smoothie implies the existence of a roughie" was posted on Twitter by 𝕷𝖎𝖑 𝕴𝖓𝖘𝖊𝖈𝖚𝖗𝖊 on…
“The existence of the meatball sub implies that there is a meatball dom”
"Dominance and submission" or "dom/sub" does not apply to "sub" sandwiches, but there are jokes. "Meatball dom / meatball sub" was posted on Twitter by…
“The existence of the umami flavor profile implies the existence of an aypapi flavor”
Umami (often pronounced like "you mammy") implies the existence of what? You daddy? You pappy? "If umami is one of the five basic tastes, then I want the sixth undiscovered taste to…
“The existence of umami implies the existence of udaddy”
Umami (often pronounced like "you mammy") implies the existence of what? You daddy? You pappy? "If umami is one of the five basic tastes, then I want the sixth undiscovered taste to…
“The existence of umami implies the existence of udadi”
Umami (often pronounced like "you mammy") implies the existence of what? You daddy? You pappy? "If umami is one of the five basic tastes, then I want the sixth undiscovered taste to…
“The existence of umami implies the existence of upapi”
Umami (often pronounced like "you mammy") implies the existence of what? You daddy? You pappy? "If umami is one of the five basic tastes, then I want the sixth undiscovered taste to…
“The existence of unsalted saltines suggests the existence of salted unsaltines”
Saltine crackers come in an "unsalted" version. Many people have suggested that the name "saltine" should be changed for unsalted saltine crackers.…