“As useless as the ‘ea’ in ‘tea’”
"The 'ea' in 'tea' is silent" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "As useless as the 'ea' in Tea" was posted on X/Twitter by…
“As we get closer to Halloween, remember: No stoner likes your kid enough to give them their edibles”
A popular belief is that some unethical people put sharp objects or drugs in trick-or-treat Halloween candy. "Drugs are expensive. No one is putting them in your kid's candy" is a…
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, life’s a bitch and beer’s a must”
"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust" is a popular Christian burial saying, based on Genesis 3:19 (King James Version): "In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto…
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Life’s a bitch and coffee’s a must”
"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust" is a popular Christian burial saying, based on Genesis 3:19 (King James Version): "In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto…
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Life’s a bitch, a drink is a must”
"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust" is a popular Christian burial saying, based on Genesis 3:19 (King James Version): "In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto…
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Life’s a bitch, and vodka’s a must”
"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust" is a popular Christian burial saying, based on Genesis 3:19 (King James Version): "In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto…
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. When life’s a bitch, whiskey’s a must”
"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust" is a popular Christian burial saying, based on Genesis 3:19 (King James Version): "In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto…
“Ask an atheist who’s just had a great meal if he believes there’s a cook”
"The best reply to an atheist is to give him a good dinner and ask him if he believes there is a cook," wrote attorney and author Louis Nizer (1902-1994) on August 17, 1945, in a…
“Asking me if I’m hungry is like asking me if I want money”
"Asking me if I'm hungry is like asking me if I want money" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the answer is "Yes." "Asking me if I'm…
“Astronaut 1: I can’t find any milk. Astronaut 2: In space, no one can. Here, use cream”
"In space, no one can hear you scream" is an advertising tagline for the film Alien (1979) that was created by Barbara Gips. A joke was posted on Twitter by Mrs L on October 16, 2011:…
“At first, I couldn’t believe that vodka is made from fucking potatoes…”
Many people are surprised that some vodka is made from potatoes. A curse word is often used, causing confusion and humor. "wait wait vodka is made from fucking potatoes? #mindfucked" was…
“At least my coffee won’t get cold in hell”
"On the bright side, my coffee will never get cold in hell" and "At least my coffee won't get cold in hell" are jocular coffee sayings that have been printed on many…
“At my age please stop asking me my likes & dislikes. I like money & food and I dislike not having money & food, please don’t stress me out”
Entry in progress -- BP X/Twitte KingStone @lordasphalt Stop asking me what my likes and dislikes are, I like MONEY! I dislike not having MONEY! don’t stress me 6:07 AM · Jul 4, 2019 X/Twitte…
“At my age, ‘getting lucky’ means having coffee without interruption”
"At my age, 'getting lucky' means having coffee without interruption" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "At my age, 'getting lucky'…
“At my age, I don’t even buy green bananas”
"At my age, I don't even buy green bananas" is often credited to Florida Congressman Claude Pepper (1900-1989), but there's no documentary evidence that he said it before 1986.…
“At my house, we pray after we eat”
People often pray before a meal (such as a grace prayer) to give thanks for the food on the table. The comedian Rodney Dangerfield (1921-2004) joked: "My wife is the worst cook in the world.…
“At some point, Subway convinced us all it’s healthy to eat a whole loaf of bread in one sitting”
Many people who order a sub at Subway feel like they're eating a whole loaf of bread in one sitting. "'Ha! And you thought you couldn't eat an entire loaf of bread.' - me…
“At the stroke of midnight, Neil wept softly, cradling the sour cream as it expired”
Food doesn't suddenly go bad at the exact second of the printed expiration date, but there are jokes. This was posted on Twitter by blake on June 1, 2012: "At the stroke of midnight, Neil…
“At this point, I don’t know if coffee is a hobby or survival instinct”
"At this point, I don't know if coffee is a hobby or survival instinct" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "At this point, I don't know if coffee is a…
“Ate a box of Thin Mints. Didn’t get thinner. I don’t think they work”
"Ate a box of Thin Mints. Didn't get thinner. I don't think they work" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The popular "Thin Mints" Girl Scout…