"Penance" can sound like "pennants." There is a joke about this. "My church gives away pointy flags to those who ask forgiveness from a priest... You should go there if you…
When another telling of a joke doesn't work, "I guess you had to be there" is what the joke teller often says. "Did you hear the one about the mandatory meeting? I guess you had…
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: 2019-20 coronavirus outbreakThe 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic is an ongoing global pandemic of coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19), caused by severe acute…
"No rest for the wicked" is from the Book of Isaiah verses 48:22 and 57:20-21. "No rest for the wicket" is a cricket joke. "The Bowlers have plenty to do, and there is no…
"I heard the government is putting chips inside people. I hope I get Doritos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The "chips" are usually radio-frequency…
"I heard the government is putting chips inside people. I hope I get Doritos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The "chips" are usually radio-frequency…
"I heard the government is putting chips inside people. I hope I get Doritos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The "chips" are usually radio-frequency…
"I heard the government is putting chips inside people. I hope I get Doritos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The "chips" are usually radio-frequency…
"I heard the government is putting chips inside people. I hope I get Doritos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The "chips" are usually radio-frequency…
"I heard the more colorful your salad, the better it is for you. So I replaced my croutons with M&M’s" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. M&M's…
"Moderation in all things" or "Everything in moderation" is an old proverb. A joke was posted on Twitter on October 17, 2013: "I heard there was a new store called…
A legal case isn't the same as a bookcase, but there are "case" jokes. "I heard you can get lawyers at Ikea now. They're very affordable, but you have to build your own…
Peanut butter is more common than almond butter, and there might be a good reason for that. This was posted on X/Twitter by Kevin Farzad on March 25, 2018, and this received over 2,800 likes:…
The radio talk show Car Talk used many funny fictional names. "Ok, another Car Talk fan. The Russian chauffeur is Pickup Andropov" was posted on the newsgroup rec.arts.bonsai on January…
"Hit the gym" is an expression meaning "go to the gym" that's not meant to be taken as a literal "hit," but there's a joke: "I hit the gym, but I drove…
An old joke has a golfer say this after a bad round of golf: "I hit two great balls on the golf course -- I stepped on a rake at the sand trap." The joke has been cited in print in 1985,…
"It takes a village to raise a child" is an African proverb. "I homeschool because I have seen the village and I don't want it raising my children" (or "We homeschool…
Some people like dogs more than people. "I honestly don't care what you think of me. Except your dog..I really want your dog to like me" was posted on Facebook by "It's…
"I hope my government will let me go outside today" is a saying (the speaker is shown with many vaccine needles in the body) that has been shown on many images. The speaker slavishly…
"I hope one day I love something the way women in commercials love yogurt" (or "I hope someday I love something the way women in commercials love yogurt" is a saying that has…