“I don’t drink beer. I drink a wheat smoothie”
“I don’t drink beer. I drink a wheat smoothie" is a jocular drinking saying that has been printed on many images. "Beer is just a wheat smoothie, for the soul. Happy St…
Big Mango (Bangkok, Thailand nickname)
“I don’t even know how to use my own credit card anymore. Tap it? Swipe it? Bop it? Twist it?”
Credit cards and debit cards used to be swiped, but now can also be inserted or tapped. It can be confusing. "First they tell me to swipe it, then to stick it, and now to tap it? Credit cards…
“I don’t even know how to use my own debit card anymore. Tap it? Swipe it? Bop it? Twist it?”
Credit cards and debit cards used to be swiped, but now can also be inserted or tapped. It can be confusing. "First they tell me to swipe it, then to stick it, and now to tap it? Credit cards…
“I don’t have a bucket list but my bikeit list is a mile long”
"I don’t have a bucket list but my bikeit list is a mile long" is a one-line biking saying that has been printed on many images. "I don't have a bucket list... but my…
“I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine”
"I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine/it" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown. "I don't have a…
“I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without it”
"I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine/it" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown. "I don't have a…
“I don’t have enough coffee or middle fingers for today”
"I don’t have enough coffee or middle fingers for today" (meaning that it's a tough, disagreeable day) is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "I…
“I don’t know how to use TikTok, but I can write in cursive, do long division, and tell time”
"I don’t know how to use TikTok, but I can write in cursive, do long division, and tell time on clocks with hands" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker…
“I don’t know if Twitter has ever caused the lame to walk, but it has caused the dumb to speak”
"The people were amazed when they saw the mute speaking, the crippled made well, the lame walking and the blind seeing. And they praised the God of Israel" is from Matthew 15:31.There are…
“I don’t know much, but I do know it’s really hard to feel bad when you’re eating dumplings”
Many people love to eat dumplings. "We might be a little biased, but we're pretty sure life is just better when you're eating dumplings!" was posted on X/Twitter by 168 Asian…
“I don’t know the secret of happiness, but I’ve never been sad at an Italian restaurant”
"I don't know the secret to happiness, but I've never been sad at a Mexican restaurant" is a saying that has been printed on several images. "I don’t necessarily know the…
“I don’t know what my spirit animal is, but I’m pretty sure it has a cone around its neck”
"'I don’t know what my spirit animal is, but I’m pretty sure it has a cone around its neck.' -- @Sheila_Mac420 (via @SelenaMaranjian)" was posted on Facebook by Mark…
“I don’t know whose manager needs to hear this, but pizza is not a bonus”
Many managers see employees working hard and reward them with pizza. The employees, however, really want bonuses. A pizza meme was posted on Facebook by Drew Kamin on October 15, 2019. "When…
“I don’t like math puns. But I will make one if I half two”
"Half" is sometimes confused with "have." A joke was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on August 20, 2022: "I don’t like math puns. But I will make one if I half two."…
“I don’t like stairlifts. They drive me up the wall”
Do stairlifts drive people up a wall (an expression meaning "crazy")? "I don't think I would ever purchase a stairlift. They would drive me up the wall" was posted on…
“I don’t like to brag, but I’ve been avoiding people since way before the coronavirus”
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak caused many people to stay at home and to avoid being with other people. Antisocial people felt vindicated. A joke was posted on Twitter by Snarky Mommy on March…
“I don’t like to toot my own horn, which is why I steal other people’s trumpets”
"Toot one's own horn" (to promote one's self) is an idiomatic expression. It has little to do with actually playing horns, but there are jokes. "I don't like to toot…
“I don’t like whiny and cheesy people, but I do like wine and cheese people”
"I don’t like whiny and cheesy people, but I do like wine and cheese people" is a jocular one-line wine-and-cheese saying that has been printed on several images. The saying has been…
“I don’t make mistakes. I make spicy decisions”
"I don’t make mistakes. I make spicy decisions" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I don’t make mistakes, only spicy decisions" was posted on X/Twitter by…
“I don’t necessarily know the secret to happiness, but I do know Jesus and Mexican food…”
"I don't know the secret to happiness, but I've never been sad at a Mexican restaurant" is a saying that has been printed on several images. "I don’t necessarily know the…