"I'm at a place in my life where errands are starting to count as going out" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker is an adult who no longer goes out…
Bananas go bad very quickly. "I’m beginning to think that I buy bananas just to watch them die a slow death in my kitchen" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on several…
The expression "not one shred of evidence" means "nothing at all." It usually doesn't refer to shredded cheese, but there are jokes. "I’m being blamed for the…
"I'm not regular broke, I'm high class broke. I'm broqué" and "I’m broke but not like the poor broke, I’m (a/the) classy type of broke. I’m broqué" are…
A joke about Presidents' Day is a reminder that presidents make campaign promises that they seldom keep. "Happy Presidents Day... Celebrate Presidents Day by making a promise you have no…
Does leaning forward help make a better video game player? "I am 100% convinced that leaning forward while playing video games substantially improves overall performance. /via @nessie111-works…
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak caused many news outlets to instruct people to wash their hands. A comment was posted on Twitter by Liz Buckley on March 2, 2020: "I’m deeply disturbed by…
A "people-pleaser" joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on August 17, 2020: "I’m done being a people pleaser. If everyone’s ok with that." "I’m done being a people…
"I'm dreaming of a white Christmas" is a famous line in Irving Berlin's classic Christmas song, "White Christmas" (1942). A "white Christmas" joke that has…
"I’m driving a stick shift. We’re on a hill. Do you really want to be close enough to read this?” (bumper sticker) is a jocula saying that has been printed on many images. "ok funny…
"I’m from New York, where people say 'you’re welcome' to remind you to say 'thank you'" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Some of the images…
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in the closing of barbershops and hair salons. People stayed in their homes and did not look their best. "I’ve gotten too comfortable looking ugly…
"I’m glad I don’t have to hunt for my food. I don’t even know where sandwiches live" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I'm glad I don't have to hunt…
"I’m glad I learned about the Pythagorean theorem instead of taxes in school. It’s really come in handy this Pythagorean theorem season" is a joke that has been printed on many…
To be "going through a lot" usually means that one has many troubles, but not always. "I’m going through a lot right now. I can't seem to find a parking spot" was posted…
Many people find that parallel parking is difficult. "I hate when people are outside when I'm trying to parallel park. I need some privacy!" is a saying that has been printed on…
"I'm excited to announce that I've just about had it" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker is fed up with circumstances (such as at a job) and…
"I am currently experiencing life at a rate of several WTFS per hour" (WTF = What The Fuck) is a saying that has been printed on many images. There are several minor variations. "is…
LinkedIn is an American business and employment-oriented social networking service website. THere is no LinkedOut for unemployed or retired people, but there are jokes. "In these rough…
"I’m just one step away from being filthy rich. All I need now is money" is a money saying that has been printed on many images. "I’m just one step away from being filthy Rich..…