“When a clock battery dies, the clock records the time of its death”
A clock's dead battery records the time of its death. "It's always creepy when a clock battery dies. It's time of death is displayed in your room until you replace it" was…
Nicknames/Slogans
“When a clown moves into a palace, he doesn’t become a king. The palace becomes a circus”
Entry in progress -- BP Twitter🇺🇸🟠 Tom 🟠🇺🇸 (@Recon_0321 GETTR)@TRCreamer'When a clown moves into a palace, he doesn't become a king. The palace becomes a…
“When a computer overheats, it freezes”
"I find it ironic that when a computer overheats it 'freezes'" is a seemingly contradictory observation that was posted on Twitter on April 13, 2010. "Its funny how when a…
“When a diplomat says yes, he means perhaps…”
A popular joke involves a lady and a diplomat. The lady can't say "yes" and the diplomat can't say "no." The joke is from the Berliner Tageblatt and has been cited in…
“When a door closes another door should open, but if it doesn’t then go in through the window”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterBurton Brown Sr.@BurtonBrownWhen a door closes another door should open, but if it doesn't then go in through the window. Anonymous #quote11:01 AM - 7 May 2018
“When a drummer comes out of retirement, there are repercussions”
Drums are percussion instruments, and there are "repercussions" jokes. "When Stan went against his wife's wishes and came out of retirement to tour as a drummer again, he knew…
“When a fellow says, ‘It ain’t the money but the principle of the thing,’ it’s the money”
Kin Hubbard (1868-1930) drew the popular "Abe Martin Says" one-panel newspaper comic. Many sayings became widely quoted. "When a feller says, 'It hain't th' money, but…
“When a girl at the gym tightens her ponytail, you know shit is about to go down”
"When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know it's/shit's about to go down" is an exercise/sports saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When a girl is a good cook, it cancels out like 3 red flags”
"When a guy is a good cook, it cancels out like three red flags" is a relationship saying that has been printed on many images. Good food is highly valued. "When a guy is a good cook…
“When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know shit’s about to go down”
"When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know it's/shit's about to go down" is an exercise/sports saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When a girl is working out and she tightens her ponytail, you know it’s about to go down”
"When a girl is playing a sport and she tightens her ponytail, you know it's/shit's about to go down" is an exercise/sports saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When a guy can cook, it automatically cancels out like three red flags”
"When a guy is a good cook, it cancels out like three red flags" is a relationship saying that has been printed on many images. Good food is highly valued. "When a guy is a good cook…
“When a guy is a good cook, it cancels out like three red flags”
"When a guy is a good cook, it cancels out like three red flags" is a relationship saying that has been printed on many images. Good food is highly valued. "When a guy is a good cook…
“When a habit begins to cost money, it is called a hobby”
"When a habit begins to cost money, it is called a hobby" is a jocular one-line saying that appears to have been coined in the "Little Liz" newspaper comic strip in January…
“When a hot person at work emails me I’m like this email could have been a meeting”
Many employees who are dragged into a meeting by a boss later lament that "this meeting could have been an email." Sometimes, however, people desire a meeting over an email, especially so…
“When a man can cook, it automatically cancels out three red flags”
"When a guy is a good cook, it cancels out like three red flags" is a relationship saying that has been printed on many images. Good food is highly valued. "When a guy is a good cook…
“When a Man Does the BBQ” (joke)
A meme called "BBQ Rules" or "The Aussie/Canadian/Dutch/Kiwi BBQ Routine" or "When a Man Does the BBQ" has been printed on many images and goes like this, with several…
“When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like 3 red flags”
"When a guy is a good cook, it cancels out like three red flags" is a relationship saying that has been printed on many images. Good food is highly valued. "When a guy is a good cook…
“When a man opens the car door for his wife, either the car is new or the wife is”
"When a man opens the car door for his wife, either the car is new or the wife is" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. The saying has been cited in print since at…
“When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband and half the salary”
“When a man retires, his wife gets twice/double the husband and half the salary/pay/income/cash" is an old retirement joke, cited in print since at least 1964. The saying has been credited…