“I want my food dead—not sick, not wounded—dead”
A line in Woody Allen's 1966 Broadway comedy, Don't Drink the Water, has become much-quoted with food writers: "WALTER. I will not eat oysters. They're alive when you eat them.…
A line in Woody Allen's 1966 Broadway comedy, Don't Drink the Water, has become much-quoted with food writers: "WALTER. I will not eat oysters. They're alive when you eat them.…
"Bartender" should not be confused with "Bart ender," but there are jokes. "I want to be a bartender. Men named Bart... look out" was posted on Twitter by Caitlyn Beth…
"I want to be a nice person, but everyone is just so stupid" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I want to be a nice person, but people are just so fucking…
"I want to be a nice person, but everyone is just so stupid" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I want to be a nice person, but people are just so fucking…
"I want to be a nice person, but everyone is just so stupid" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I want to be a nice person, but people are just so fucking…
"I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole" is a jocular social media saying that has been printed on many images. The ssaying was posted on…
"I don't want to protect the environment, I want to create a world where the environment doesn't need protecting" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying…
A popular joke has a fairy (or genie) grant a person a wish. The person wishes to live forever, but the fairy says he can't do that. Then the person says that he/she wants to die the day after…
"I want to grow my own food, but I can’t find any bacon seeds" -- bacon does not have seeds -- is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I'm trying to be…
Donuts (or "doughnuts") aren't healthy and do not grow from seeds, but there are jokes. "Was thinking today i might try to grow some of my own food... Where do you buy donut and…
"I want to grow my own food, but no one makes pizza seeds" is a jocular one-line saying. "I want to grow my own food but no one makes pizza seeds" was cited on Twitter on…
The Food Network often gets its viewers hungry. "I want to live in a world where the Food Network delivers" is a jocular line that has been printed on several images. "Wonders if the…
The Food Network often gets its viewers hungry. "I want to live in a world where the Food Network delivers" is a jocular line that has been printed on several images. "Wonders if the…
A classic sports joke about a losing team (insert any team's name) has a judge deciding custody in a divorce proceeding. The child says that both his father and his mother beat him.…
"I want to make pancakes, but I keep waffling" -- "waffling" is a joke on "waffles" -- is a jocular saying that has been printed on a sign. "This morning the…
"Dominance and submission" or "dom/sub" does not apply to "sub" sandwiches, but there are jokes. "thegutlesswonder: a bdsm themed sandwich shop called Dom’s…
What's classier than a dollar store? "I want to open a two dollar store for people that enjoy the finer things" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images.…
"I want to start juicing but I'm hesitant because I don't know how to juice tacos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter by…
"I want to start juicing, but I'm hesitant because I don't know how to juice a pizza" is a jocular saying about juicing that has been printed on an image. According to the…
Saké is Japanese rice wine. It looks like the word "sake," and is sometimes used jocularly in the expression "for fuck's sake." "for fuck's sake (like for…