“A marathon runner walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A marathon runner variation is: "A marathon runner walks into a bar. The bartender…
Food/Drink
“A marathoner walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A marathon runner variation is: "A marathon runner walks into a bar. The bartender…
“A Marine on duty has no friends” (Marine Corps proverb)
"A Marine on duty has no friends" is a proverb of the United States Marine Corps, cited in print since at least 1973. The saying means that a Marine has a duty to serve the country, even…
“A market that rallies on bad news could signal a bottom” (Wall Street adage)
Sometimes the stock market can rally on bad financial news. There could be several reasons for this. The first reason is that the stock market might have discounted the bad news in advance as…
“A Marxist is someone who loves humanity in groups of one million or more”
Marxists often talk about groups, not individuals. There's a joke: "A Marxist is someone who loves humanity in groups of one million or more." The political joke has been cited in…
“A mask is not a political statement. It’s an IQ test”
"Covid-19. It started as a virus and has mutated into an IQ test" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Many people believed that a person wearing a face mask (and following…
“A masochist walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." There are several versions involving a masochist walking into a physical "bar."…
“A mathematician walks into a bar and orders ten times the drinks of everyone else…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A mathematician version is: "A mathematician walks into a bar and asks for ten times…
“A mathematician, a college professor, and a textbook author walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A math and science version is: "A mathematician walks into a bar. The punchline is…
“A Matter of Taste” (Tasti D-Lite)
Tasti D-Lite calls itself "New York's #1 frozen dessert." It's supposed to be low in calories, but testing has shown that it still has plenty of calories (but fewer than ice…
“A McDonald’s sign said, ‘All Day Breakfast.’ I thought, ‘I don’t have time for that’”
The Waffle House and IHOP (International House of Pancakes) have been serving breakfast all day ("breakfast anytime") since the 1950s. Jack in the Box has served breakfast all day since…
“A meal without wine is breakfast”
"A meal without wine is breakfast" is a saying of unknown origin, cited in print since at least the 1990s. Not everyone agrees with the saying -- there are champagne and mimosa…
“A meatball is just a bite-sized meatloaf”
Meatloaf has often been compared to meatballs. "Meatballs are just smaller, bite sized pieces of meatloaf" was posted on Twitter by Patrick Fong on December 23, 2014. "A meatball is…
“A meatball sub is basically just an Italian taco”
"A meatball sub is basically just an Italian taco" is an observation tat was posted on Twitter by ↁ𝖩 on February 23, 2016. "The meatball sub is basically just an Italian…
“A median and a mode walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A math version is: "A median and a mode walk into a bar. The bartender says,…
“A meeting is no substitute for progress”
"A meeting is no substitute for progress" has been cited in print since at least 1968. A company president (this might have once been true or it might have been a joke) used the…
“A meeting without food should be an email”
"A meeting without food should be an email" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Any meeting without food should literally just be an email" was posted on…
“A member of our school brass band was a dyslexic girl who played the Toblerone!”
"Trombone" (a musical instrument in the brass family) shouldn't be confused with "Toblerone" (a Swiss chocolate brand), but there are jokes. "I am so proud of my…
“A microwave is an easy bake oven for adults”
The Easy-Bake Oven is a toy that was introduced in 1963 to help teach young children to cook. A microwave oven is sometimes said to be a similar toy for older individuals. "Our microwave is…
“A midget stumbles out of the bar… He was a little drunk”
"A midget stumbles out of the bar... He was a little drunk" is a bar joke that was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on November 7, 2020. "A little drunk" usually means "a bit…