“If the germ theory were true, nobody would be alive to believe it”
"If the 'germ theory of disease' were correct, there'd be no one living to believe it" or "If the 'germ theory of disease' were correct, there would be…
Food/Drink
“If the good Lord’s willin’ (and the creeks don’t rise)”
"If the Good Lord's Willin' (and the Creeks Don't Rise)" means that if all goes well and nothing unforeseen occurs, this event will happen. "If The Good Lord's…
“If the government cannot protect the vote, the border or its citizens, then why do we have one?”
If government can't protect its citizens, then why have government? "If the government cannot protect the vote, there is no need for that government" was posted on Twitter by Michael…
“If the government has enough money to give to foreign countries…”
"If the government has enough money to give/send to foreign countries, then the government is taking too much money from taxpayers" is a saying that has been printed on several images.…
“If the government has enough money to send to foreign countries…”
"If the government has enough money to give/send to foreign countries, then the government is taking too much money from taxpayers" is a saying that has been printed on several images.…
“If the government was created to protect our liberties, why do we have to fight…?”
"If the government was created to protect our liberties, why do we have to fight with the government to keep them?" is a saying that as been printed on an image. The saying as been…
“If the grass is greener on the other side, you can bet the water bill is higher”
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence" is an old proverb meaning that everyone's situation in life is seemingly (if not actually) more desirable than one's…
“If the grocery store has a section for health food, then what is the rest of the store?”
"If there is a 'health food' section in the grocery store, what does that make the rest of the food sold there?" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Dr, Mark Hyman…
“If the internet had a boat, where would they park it?”/“Google Docs.”
Google Docs ("docs" is short for "documents") has nothing to do with "docks," but there are jokes. "If the Internet had a boat, where would they park it? In…
“If the mayo can go bad, it will go bad. Murphy’s Slaw”
"Murphy's law ("Anything that can go wrong will go wrong") shouldn't be confused with Murphy's slaw (cole slaw), but there are jokes. "RT @awryone If the mayo can…
“If the menu doesn’t have dollar signs by the prices, it’s too expensive”
Many expensive restaurants don't put dollar signs on their menus. This is said to make expensive menu items psychologically easier to order. "If the menu doesn't have dollar signs in…
“If the military wanted you to have a family, they’d have issued you one”
A military career is a difficult path to raise a family. "If the military wanted you to have a family, they would have issued you one" is an old joke. "If the Marine Corps wanted you…
“If the news is fake, imagine how bad history is”
"If the news is fake, imagine how bad history is" is a saying that has been printed on many images. TwitterOshrat Nir@oshratnWritten by the victors. So... #fake RT @AmuseChimp if the news…
“If the next season of America doesn’t have dragons, what are we even doing”
The United States isn't a television show, but some people think it could be. This was posted on X/Twitter by "Jason, ex Inferis" on July 13, 2024: "If the next season of…
“If the ocean was whiskey and i was a duck…”
A verse has been printed on several images: "If the ocean was vodka and I was a duck,I'd swim to the bottom and never come up.But the ocean's not vodka and I'm not a duck,So…
“If the only job you can get is to teach the same subject you graduated at, it’s a pyramid scheme”
Many people get university degrees (especially in humanities fields), and then the only job available is to teach that subject. "If the only job you can get with your degree is a…
“If the penalty for a crime is a fine, then that law only exists for the lower class”
"If the penalty for a crime is a fine, then that law only exists for the lower class" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The image is from the game Final Fantasy Tactics…
“If the penalty for a crime is a fine, then the law only exists if you are poor”
"If the penalty for a crime is a fine, then that law only exists for the lower class" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The image is from the game Final Fantasy Tactics…
“If the people lead, the leaders will follow”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Google News Archive13 April 1983, The Dispatch (Eatonville, WA), "Ohop stand supported by WPPSS exec.," pg. 1, col. 5:"If the people lead, the leaders will…
“If the plan doesn’t work, change the plan, but never the goal”
"If the plan doesn’t work, change the plan, but never the goal" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "If the plan doesn’t work, change the plan, but…