“I’d make a COVID joke, but it would be tasteless”
The 2020 COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic caused sufferers to lose a sense of taste. "I wanted to make a COVID joke, but I think that'd be pretty tasteless" was posted on Twitter by…
The 2020 COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic caused sufferers to lose a sense of taste. "I wanted to make a COVID joke, but I think that'd be pretty tasteless" was posted on Twitter by…
"I'll Be Home for Christmas" (1943) is a Christmas song written by the lyricist Kim Gannon and composer Walter Kent and recorded by Bing Crosby. It referred to soldiers in World War…
“I’ll believe corporations are people when Texas executes one” has been cited in print since at least September 2011 and was popularly used on signs in the Occupy Wall Street movement during…
Where's Waldo? is the title of the first book in a series, published in 1987. Waldo was difficult to locate. "I'm convinced Waldo owed some people money. Hiding ass nigga" was…
"I am going 2 change my Facebook username to NOBODY so when i see a boring status..i will like it..then it read:NOBODY LIKE THIS" was posted on Twitter on September 4, 2012. "Very…
"I’ll do algebra, I’ll do trig, I’ll even do statistics, but graphing is where I draw the line" is a math saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on the…
"I will eat a bowl of water with a fork before I care what anyone thinks of me" (or "I will eat a bowl of water with a fork before I give a fuck about your opinion of me") is a…
Can you substitute a Pepsi in a "rum and coke"? Dan Mentos made a popular tweet on November 23, 2014: “I’ll have a rum and coke”Is pepsi ok?“Sure whatever”*hands you a pepsi and…
A Klondike bar is an ice cream bar coated with a thin layer of chocolate. "What would you do for a Klondike bar?" is a memorable ad jingle that began in 1982. "I'll never be…
U.S. President John F. Kennedy was assassinated on November 22, 1963. People who were alive at that time usually recall where they were when they first heard the news. A joke involves people who…
"I’ll sell my broken watch when the time is right. http://bit.ly/WyrZaq via @sickipedia" was posted on Twitter by Fresh Stand Up on March 18, 2013. The joke originated on the Sickipedia…
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic led to several jokes. "Let me tell you this coronavirus joke.We have to wait two weeks to see if you got it" was posted on Twitter by Imtiaz Mahmood on…
"I'll vacuum the beach before I tell Facebook I'm in a relationship again" is a saying that has been printed on many images. In other words -- never. "I’ll vacuum the…
Many people wonder why a self-cleaning over can't clean the rest of the kitchen, or the rest of the house. "Why hasn't anyone taken the idea of 'self-cleaning oven' and…
“I’m a lawyer.” “Honest?” “No, the regular kind" is a lawyer joke that was posted on the newsgroup alt.bbs.wildcat on February 15, 1996. The joke is that the speaker had meant…
"I lick, swallow and suck... The salt, the tequila, the lime!" is a drinking/sex joke that has been printed on many images. Some images have it as, "I LICK the salt. I SWALLOW the…
An épée has nothing to do with an EpiPen, but there are jokes. "or where he keeps his fencing equipment: The epee pen" was posted on Twitter by Kenneth Baer on September 19, 2016.…
"I used to just crastinate. Then I decided to go pro" is a jocular procrastination saying that has been printed on many images. "I'm an amateur crastinator. Someday I'll…
Many people -- if not all -- like to get paid without doing any work. "I’m anti-work but pro-paycheck so you see my dilemma" was posted on Twitter by Tuesdays with Taca on January 17,…
"Aspiring" should not be confused with "aspirin," but there are jokes. "You see, I'm Aspirin' to become an agricultural tumour, sorry, a Farmer Cyst!" was…