“Took a girl to Starbucks because I forgot her name”
Starbucks coffeehouses ask for a customer's name when the order is taken. "Took a girl to Starbucks because I forgot her name" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on…
Archive for /P26080
“Diet tip: Your pants will never get too tight if you don’t wear any”
"Diet tip: Your pants will never get too tight if you don't wear any" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted by…
“Sex ed classes in school should just be listening to a baby cry for 5 hours straight”
"Sex education classes in school should just be listening to a baby cry for 5 hours straight while watching the same cartoon on repeat" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed…
“Nobody texts faster than a pissed off female”
"Nobody texts faster than a pissed off female" is a jocular one-lien saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter by Dylan Horst on July 31, 2012.…
“IKEA: Legos for adults”
IKEA is a store that sells ready-to-assemble furniture. It's often been compared to children's LEGO plastic construction toys. "Adult Legos (IKEA)" was cited in May 2007.…
“Why did the vampire flunk art class?”/“He could only draw blood.”
A vampire riddle is: Q: Why did the vampire (Dracula) flunk art class?A: He could only draw blood. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1997. Google BooksWorld's Silliest JokesBy…
“Cheese makers have many expenses in curd”
"Cheese makers have many expenses in curd (incurred)"is an infrequently told cheese pun. The pun was a "Pun of the Day" on Yahoo! Groups on April 30, 2002. Yahoo! GroupsPuns of…
“Why did the piece of cheese go to the gym?”/“To get shredded.”
People go to the gym to get ripped. A cheese riddle is: Q: Why did the piece of cheese go to the gym?A: To get shredded. The joke was posted on the website Pun of the Day and was also posted on…
“Why did the piece of cheese go to the gym?”/“To get shredded.”
People go to the gym to get ripped. A cheese riddle is: Q: Why did the piece of cheese go to the gym?A: To get shredded. The joke was posted on the website Pun of the Day and also was posted on…
“If you fail your kindergarten coloring book exam, you need a shoulder to crayon”
The expression "a shoulder to cry on" is often changed to the pun "a shoulder to crayon." "I'm really upset that I can't find a body part to draw, I need a…
“What did one pickle say to the other on Valentine’s Day?”/“You mean a great dill to me.”
A pickle riddle is: Q: What did one pickle say to the other on Valentine's Day?A: "You mean a great dill to me." The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2001. Google…
“If you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, remember nobody loves you on any other day”
"If you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember nobody loves you on any other day, either" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many ecards. The…
“I saw a bumper sticker that said ‘I miss New York,’ so I broke the window and stole the radio”
A bumper sticker joke was posted on Twitter on May 18, 2011: "I saw a bumper stcker that read 'I miss NY' so I broke their wndow & stole the radio, I like helping ppl feel like…
“I saw your shirt. Who’s NY?” -Overly Attached Girlfriend
"I Love NY" is a slogan that has been printed on many shirts. A joke is: "'I saw your shirt. Who's NY?' -Overly Attached Girlfriend." "RT @Obsessive_GF: I…
“Drunk people run stop signs. High people wait for them to turn green”
"Drunk people run stop signs. High people (stoners) wait for them to turn green" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "You know the old joke: 'Drunk drivers…
“The best occupation to work from home as: Bartender.”
What's the best job that allows you to work at home? A jocular one-liner is: "The best occupation to work from home as: Bartender." "The best occupation to work from home as is:…
“My internet was down for 5 minutes, so I spoke to my family. They seem like nice people”
Does the internet make people antisocial? A joke has been printed on many ecards: "My internet was down for 5 minutes so I went downstairs and spoke to my family… They seem like nice…
“Why are pizza slices shaped that way? Do they expect our mouths to get wider after each bite?”
Pizza is usually circular and cut into triangles. "Karen" posted on Twitter on January 29, 2014: "Why are pizza slices shaped that way ?? Do they expect our mouths to get wider after…
“Disappointed to learn that ‘landlady’ isn’t the opposite of a mermaid”
"Disappointed to learn that ‘landlady’ isn’t the opposite of a mermaid" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on GIFs. James Martin posted thje one-liner on Twitter on…
“Three things tell the truth: children, drunk people and yoga pants”
"Three things tell the truth: children, drunk people and leggings/yoga pants" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "FACT: Jeans work wonders on women.…