“Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs”
A popular "yo mama" insult "lazy joke" is: "Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs." The joke was posted on the newsgroup…
Archive for /P22420
“I thought I had found the perfect website to help me with my fear of flying—until it crashed”
A joke about websites and the meaning of "crashing" was posted on Twitter by sickipediabot on February 11, 2011: "I thought I'd found the perfect website to help me overcome my…
“I know loads of jokes about cash machines, I just can’t think of one atm”
"ATM" can stand for "Automated Teller Machine," but it can also mean "At The Moment." "I was gonna tweet a joke about a bank but I just can't think of one…
“At work, a coffee machine always gets fixed faster than a printer”
Many people can't work without coffee. "It's funny how a coffee machine problem generally gets fixed faster then an infrastructure problem" was posted on Twitter on May 16,…
“Sheet music is really just a sound recipe”
A music pun was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on March 9, 2015: "Sheet music is like a sound recipe." The joke is that a "sound recipe" can mean a "recipe of…
“I passed my paintball exam with flying colors”
Students who pass an exam easily are said to do so "with flying colors." It's sometimes joked that the test was a paintball exam. "I passed my paintball exam with flying…
“Where is the most open green space in New York City?”/“Central Pork.”
A pig riddle is: Q: Where is the most open green space in New York City?A: Central Pork. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Wikipedia: Central ParkCentral Park is an urban park…
“I thought I had found the perfect website to help me with my fear of flying—until it crashed”
A joke about websites and the meaning of "crashing" was posted on Twitter by sickipediabot on February 11, 2011: "I thought I'd found the perfect website to help me overcome my…
“The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible”
"The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "Hope sees the invisible,…
“If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into committees. That’ll do them in”
"If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into committees. That'll do them in" is a jocular saying about committees that has been printed on many images. "If machines…
“Winter is the only season that comes twice a year”
Winter includes the month of January (the first month of the year) and also the month of December (the last month of the year). "Did you know winter is the only season that 'comes'…
Highlanders (American League baseball team, later called Yankees)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Other early nicknames of the New York Yankees include "Hilltoppers," "Invaders" and "Porchclimbers." Joseph W. Gordon, president of the club…
“If anyone tells you your dreams are silly, there’s a millionaire who invented the pool noodle”
"If anyone ever tells you your dreams are silly, remember there’s some millionaire walking around who invented the Pool Noodle" is a jocular line that has been printed on several…
Hilltoppers (American League baseball team, later called Yankees)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Other early nicknames of the New York Yankees include "Highlanders," "Invaders" and "Porchclimbers." Wikipedia: New York YankeesThe New York…
Invaders (American League baseball team, later called Yankees)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Other early nicknames of the New York Yankees include "Highlanders," "Hilltoppers" and "Porchclimbers." Wikipedia: New York YankeesThe New…
“Trains are just horizontal elevators” (“Trains are just sideways elevators”)
Trains have been compared to elevators. "Trains are like long sideways elevators...#ThoughtsinaLift" was posted on Twitter on July 18, 2012. "Trains are just sideways elevators"…
Porchclimbers (American League baseball team, later called Yankees)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Other early nicknames of the New York Yankees include "Highlanders," "Hilltoppers" and "Invaders." Wikipedia: New York YankeesThe New York…
“Sky above me, earth beneath me, fire within me”
"Sky above me, earth beneath me, fire within me" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "Sky Above, Voice Within" was the Jeremy Soule-composed…
“Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless”
"Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been credited to American…
“At my new job, I have hundreds of people under me. I mow the grass at the cemetery”
A person with many people under him/her usually has a responsible job. "At my new job, I have hundreds of people under me," an old joke goes. "I mow the grass at the cemetery."…