“A thief believes everybody steals” (proverb)
"A thief believes everybody steals" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Rather than find personal fault, the thief believes -- or wants to believe -- that everyone else is…
Archive for 01/2020
“You can say ‘have a nice day,’ but ‘enjoy your next 24 hours’ sounds threatening”
"Have a nice day" is a common greeting. "Enjoy the next 24 hours" essentially means the same thing, but sounds threatening, as if a person will experience trouble the next day.…
“Turning on your lights and sirens after you lose a drag race is just poor sportsmanship”
"Turning on your lights and siren(s) after losing a drag race is just poor sportsmanship" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker has been caught speeding by…
“Turning on your lights and sirens after losing a drag race is just poor sportsmanship”
"Turning on your lights and siren(s) after losing a drag race is just poor sportsmanship" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker has been caught speeding by…
“Turning on your lights and siren after you lose a drag race is just poor sportsmanship”
"Turning on your lights and siren(s) after losing a drag race is just poor sportsmanship" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker has been caught speeding by…
“Turning on your lights and siren after losing a drag race is just poor sportsmanship”
"Turning on your lights and siren(s) after losing a drag race is just poor sportsmanship" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker has been caught speeding by…
“What did one potato chip say to the other?”/“Shall we go for a dip?”
A potato chip riddle is: Q: What did one potato chip say to the other?A: "Shall we go for a dip?" "Dip" can mean "a swim" or "a dipping sauce." The joke has…
“For the 10th year in a row, my coworkers voted me ‘the most secretive guy’ in the office” (joke)
"I've just won the 'Most secretive person 2013' award. I can't tell you how much it means to me. #sickipedia" was posted on Twitter by Sickipedia Official on July 11,…
“I just won a reward for most secretive person in the office” (joke)
"I've just won the 'Most secretive person 2013' award. I can't tell you how much it means to me. #sickipedia" was posted on Twitter by Sickipedia Official on July 11,…
“You can say ‘have a nice day,’ but ‘enjoy the next 24 hours’ sounds threatening”
"Have a nice day" is a common greeting. "Enjoy the next 24 hours" essentially means the same thing, but sounds threatening, as if a person will experience trouble the next day.…
“A man went into a library and asked, ‘Do you have any books on shelves?’” (joke)
A popular library joke has a man ask a librarian a simple -- but misunderstood -- question. “I was doing some DIY at home, so I went to the library and said, `Have you got any books on……
“A man went into a library and asked, ‘Do you have any books on shelving?’” (joke)
A popular library joke has a man ask a librarian a simple -- but misunderstood -- question. “I was doing some DIY at home, so I went to the library and said, `Have you got any books on……
“People cheating on their taxes disgust me. This is not the world I want to raise my 23 dependents”
"People cheating on their taxes disgust me. This is not the world I want to raise my 23 dependents in" is a jocular tax saying that has been printed on many images. The joke is that the…
“A taco is a fish love letter in a corn envelope that you mail to your stomach”
"A taco is a beef love letter in a corn envelope that you mail to your stomach" is a food saying that has been printed on several images. The saying was posted on Reddit --…
“A taco is a beef love letter in a corn envelope that you mail to your stomach”
"A taco is a beef love letter in a corn envelope that you mail to your stomach" is a food saying that has been printed on several images. The saying was posted on Reddit --…
“I got in trouble at a park for lining squirrels up by height. They didn’t like me critter sizing”
"Criticizing" shouldn't be confused with "critter sizing," but there are jokes. “I am just critter sizing!” was printed in the Lyons (KS) Daily News on November 13,…
“I tried to buy a hot dog with ketchup, but the vendor would only accept cash”
A joke was posted by john on Twitter on May 22, 2017: Me: I'd like to buy a hot dog with ketchup, pleaseHim: Sorry, cash only A similar joke was reposted on Twitter on December 11, 2019.…
“Stop killing babies to make baby powder” (fake protest sign)
"Stop killing aligators to make Gatoraid" (misspelling "alligators" and "Gatorade") is a jocular -- but fake -- protest sign that has been printed on many images. The…
“Stop killing babies to make baby oil” (fake protest sign)
"Stop killing aligators to make Gatoraid" (misspelling "alligators" and "Gatorade") is a jocular -- but fake -- protest sign that has been printed on many images. The…
“Stop killing mothers to make motherboards” (fake protest sign)
"Stop killing aligators to make Gatoraid" (misspelling "alligators" and "Gatorade") is a jocular -- but fake -- protest sign that has been printed on many images. The…