“Does running out of money count as exercise?”
"Does running out of money count as exercise?" is a jocular question that has been printed on many images. “The only exercise he ever got was running out of money" was cited in…
Archive for 08/2016
“Sit-ups are the best exercise because they include the most lying down”
Sit-ups involve lying down, and this has been used in jokes. "Just got halfway to 1000 sit-ups! OK, FINE, the lying down half" was posted on Twitter on November 21, 2010. "Do the sit…
“Does balancing my checkbook count as exercise?”
"Does balancing my checkbook count as exercise?" is a one-line saying about exercise. The joke was posted by Mary Charlene on Twitter on March 3, 2014. "Does running late count as…
“Does balancing my checkbook count as exercise?”
"Does balancing my checkbook count as exercise?" is a one-line saying about exercise. The joke was posted by Mary Charlene on Twitter on March 3, 2014. "Does running late count as…
“Which American president is least guilty?”/“Lincoln. He is in a cent.”
A pun about the Abraham Lincoln-head penny is: Q: Which president is least guilty? A: Lincoln. He is in a cent. The penny pun has been cited in print since at least 2002. The "in a…
“What kind of tea is hard to swallow?”/“Reality.”
A popular pun about tea is: Q: What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow?A: Reality. The joke was from 9-year-old Benje Morris of Charlotte, North Carolina, who won a 1994 Laffy Taffy…
“Which American president is least guilty?”/“Lincoln. He is in a cent.”
A pun about the Abraham Lincoln-head penny is: Q: Which president is least guilty? A: Lincoln. He is in a cent. The penny pun has been cited in print since at least 2002. The "in a…
“What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?”/“An alley gator.”
A bowling alligator pun is: Q: What do you call an alligator who goes bowling?A: An alley gator. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1980. 24 July 1980, Lexington (KY) Herald, A Page…
Big O (Omaha, Nebraska nickname)
Omaha, Nebraska is sometimes called the 'Big O." Basketball superstar Oscar Robertson (an NBA player from 1960 to 1974) popularized "The Big O" nickname for himself. New York…
Magic City (Omaha, Nebraska nickname)
Many American cities were dubbed a "Magic City" in the 1800s because of rapid growth, Cheyenne, Wyoming was called the "Magic City" since 1867. South Omaha, Nebraska was called…
Big Yam (Lagos nickname)
New York City is the "Big Apple," and Lagos, Nigeria (the most populous city in Africa) has been called the "Big Yam." Yam is a popular African food. "Lagos: The Big…
“Alphabet soup? More like Times New Ramen, am I right?”
Times New Roman is a popular serif typeface that was originally used on The Times newspaper in London in 1931. Times New Ramen is a joke font of ramen noodles. The font was illustrated on flickr in…
Times New Ramen (Times New Roman font + ramen noodles)
Times New Roman is a popular serif typeface that was originally used on The Times newspaper in London in 1931. Times New Ramen is a joke font of ramen noodles. The font was illustrated on flickr in…
“What do you do when you see a spaceman?”/“You park, man.”
A parking joke is: Q: What do you do when you see a space man?A: You park in it, man. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1993. Google Groups: alt.tasteless.jokesJoke made me laugh when…
“No one was eating the farmer’s apples, so I told him to grow a pear”
"Grow a pair" means to "grow a pair of testicles -- to "man up" and show courage. "Grow a pear" is a joke term. "Congress should grow a pear and Im-Peach…
“I met a girl at a soccer game. I think she’s a keeper”
"She's a keeper" means that a person has found a good person for a partnership. "Keeper" in soccer (association football) means a "goalkeeper." "#manrules if…
Snopester (fan of Snopes.com)
Snopes.com is a fact-checking website that was founded by Barbara and David Mikkelson in 1995. A "Snopester" (or "snopester") is a fan of and/or a contributor to Snopes.com.…
“Opinions are like orgasms—mine matters most, and I don’t care if you have one”
"Opinions are like orgasms -- mine matters most, and I don't care if you have one" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "Opinions are like orgasms.…
“I used to run an origami company, but it folded”
An unsuccessful business "folds," and there's a classic pun: "I used to run an origami company, but it folded." "I once owned an origami business, until one day it…
“What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle & well-dressed man on a bicycle?
A popular pun is told about unicycles and bicycles (or bicycles and tricycles): Q:What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?A:…