“What did the TV do at the beach?”/“Channel surf.”
"Channel surfing" means changing television channels. It is not like water surfing, but a riddle is: Q: What did the TV do at the beach?A: Channel surf. The joke has been cited in print…
Alphebetical for "w"
“What did the TV say to the remote?”/“You turn me on.”
A television riddle is: Q: What did the TV say to the remote?A: You turn me on. The joke was posted to Twitter on August 29, 2009. "What did the remote say to the tv. 'I bet I turn you…
“What did the twice-baked potato say before it was put in the oven?”/“Damn, foiled again!”
Are twice-baked potatoes "foiled again"? "Curses! Foiled again!" is a famous phrase that has nothing to do with food. "What did the twice baked potato say before he went…
“What did the whip cream say to Indiana Jones?”/“Cool Whip.”
A whip cream riddle is: Q: What did the whip cream say to Indiana Jones?A: "Cool Whip." The joke was posted on Twitter on January 29, 2015, and was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on March 22,…
“What did the wicked chicken lay?”/“Deviled eggs.”
A riddle about deviled eggs is: Q: What did the wicked chicken lay?A: Deviled eggs. The riddle -- with some variations, such as "evil" for "wicked" and "hen" for…
“What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?”/“She witch-hiked.”
A witch riddle is: Q: What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?A: She witch-hiked. The Halloween joke has been cited in print since at least 1996. 21 October 1996, Kokomo (IN) Tribune,…
“What did the worker at the rubber band factory say when he was fired? “/“Oh, snap.”
"Oh snap!" means the same as "Oh, shit!" or "Oh, no!" It usually doesn't involve snapping, but there's a joke: "Q: What did the worker at the rubber…
“What did the worm say when he fell in a plate of spaghetti?”/“Orgy!”
Spaghetti can look like worms -- or more specifically, a worm orgy. "Desda el punto de vista de una lombriz, un plato de espaguetis es una orgia" ("From a worm's point of view,…
“What did the young pancake say to the old one?”/“I don’t like your flip side.”
A pancake riddle is: Q: What did the young pancake say to the old burnt pancake? A: I don't like your flip side. The joke was posted on Twitter on August 22, 2009.…
“What did they call the canary that flew into the pastry dish?”/“Tweetie Pie.”
Tweety (or "Tweety Pie") is an animated fictional yellow canary and not an actual pie, but there is a riddle: Q. What did they call the canary that flew into the pastry dish? A. Tweetie…
“What did they call the loudest knight of all?”/“Sir Roundsound.”
There are many fanciful names of King Arthur's Knights of the Round Table. "Surround sound" is not one of the knights, but there are puns. "The stereophonic knight: Sir Round…
“What difference does it make?”
U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was questioned by Congress on January 13, 2013 about the 2012 attack on the U.S. diplomatic mission in Benghazi. She was asked by Senator Ron Johnson (R-WI)…
“What dinosaur loves pancakes?”/“A tri-syrup-tops.”
A dinosaur riddle is: Q: What dinosaur loves pancakes?A: A tri-syrup-tops. The pancake joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.ozdebate.jokes on October 18, 1999. Wikipedia: TriceratopsTriceratops is…
“What disease did ‘cured ham’ actually have?” (joke)
"What disease did 'cured ham' actually have?" is a one-liner listed in many joke collections. A ham is "cured" with salt and nitrates to prevent the growth of…
“What do a lawyer and a sperm cell have in common?” (lawyer joke)
A popular joke has been told about lawyers since at least 1993: Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a sperm?A; A sperm has a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.…
“What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don’t?”/“Depreciation.”
An accountant riddle is: Q: What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?A: Depreciation. The joke was posted on the newsgroup uw.acct.acc131 on November 24, 1997. Google Groups:…
“What do astronauts use to stay warm?”/“A space heater.”
A "space heater" doesn't involve astronauts and outer space, but there are jokes. "Hey, what do astronauts use when they get cold? A space heater! (Sorry sorry. Sorry.)"…
“What do baby mathematicians drink?”/“Formula.”
A math riddle was posted on Twitter by Chad Topaz on October 6, 2020: Q: What do baby mathematicians drink?A: Formula. “What do you feed a baby parabola?"/"Quadratic formula" is an…
“What do birds give out on Halloween?”/“Tweets.”
"Tweets" is how Elmer Fudd (the cartoon archenemy of Bugs Bunny, whom he calls a "wabbit") might pronounce the word "treats." There are several "trick or…
“What do birds give to trick-or-treaters?”/“Tweets.”
"Tweets" is how Elmer Fudd (the cartoon archenemy of Bugs Bunny, whom he calls a "wabbit") might pronounce the word "treats." There are several "trick or…