“What are apricots?”/“Where monkeys sleep.”
Apricots aren't made from apes or cots, but there's a riddle: Q: What are apricots?A: Where monkeys sleep. The joke was posted on Twitter on September 15, 2009.…
Alphebetical for "w"
“What are lawyers good for?” (lawyer joke)
One popular lawyer joke is: Q. What are lawyers good for? A. They make used car salesmen look good. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1992. Google Groups: rec.humorLawyer JokesSlime…
“What are murder hornets and how much toilet paper do we need to buy?”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in panic buying -- and shortages -- of toilet paper. In 2020, the United States also experienced from Asia an invasion of "murder hornets."…
“What are people who back into parking spots trying to prove?”
People who back into parking spots are a peeve for many other people. "I can't help but think people who back into parking spots are just showing off" was posted on Twitter by…
“What are Santa’s favorite potato chips?”/“Crisp Pringles.”
"Kris Kringle" can sound like "crisp Pringles" (Pringles is an American brand of stackable potato-based crisps), and of course, there are jokes. "Last night I was visited…
“What are the strongest days of the week?”/“Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.”
A riddle about the days of the week has been cited in print since at least 1855: Q: What is the strongest day of the week?A: Sunday. All of the rest are "weak" days. Saturday later joined…
“What are the two things you can’t eat for breakfast?” (riddle)
"What are the two things you can't eat for breakfast?" is a classic food riddle. "Lunch and dinner" is the answer. "You know, there are two things that I can't…
“What are those things you blow to make a wish?”/“Sugar daddies.”
"My friend: 'What do you call those things you blow and make a wish?' Me: 'Breathalyzer?'" is a joke that has been printed on many images. A birthday cake has candles,…
“What are unhappy cranberries called?”/“Blueberries.”
"What are unhappy cranberries called? Blueberries." The cranberries joke -- included in many Thanksgiving joke collections -- has been cited in print since at least 1986. Google BooksThe…
“What are you doing for others?”
American clergyman and activist Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968) wrote in the book Strength to Love (1963): "Light has come into the world, and every man must decide whether he will walk in…
“What are you doing out of jail?” (Thoreau’s reply to Emerson?)
American author and naturalist Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) refused to pay poll taxes for six years because he objected to any money going to support the Mexican-American War or slavery. In July…
“What are you eating and how can I help?—dogs”
Dogs often watch (and beg) while people are eating. A joke was posted on Twitter by Elizabeth Hackett on July 20, 2017: "WHAT ARE YOU EATING AND HOW CAN I HELP?-- dogs" TwitterElizabeth…
“What are you waiting for? Christmas?”
Christmas is a big business season, and many children patiently wait for Christmas Day presents. Someone who is waiting for someone else to do a task might say, "Do I have to wait all year for…
“What are you when you can’t decide on what pizza to get?”/“Indeslicesive.”
"Indeslicesive" (indecisive + slice) means that someone can't decide on what slice to eat. The jokes usually involve a pizza slice, but the term could apply to other slices (such as…
“What athlete is warmest in winter?”/“A long jumper.”
A winter riddle is: Q: What athlete is warmest in winter?A: A long jumper. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2002. 24 December 2002, Evening Standard (London, UK), "Heard the…
“What athlete is warmest in winter?”/“A long jumper.”
A winter riddle is: Q: What athlete is warmest in winter?A: A long jumper. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2002. 24 December 2002, Evening Standard (London, UK), "Heard the…
“What baseball position do leprechauns usually play?”/“Shortstop.”
A leprechaun riddle is: Q: What baseball position do leprechauns usually play?A: Shortstop. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Kidsjokes.co.uk (June 23, 2001)St Patricks Day…
“What baseball team do dentists root for?”/“The Yanks.”
A New York Yankees ("Yanks") have had several dentist puns. "If a dentist played on a baseball team, which team would he play for? (...) The Yanks!" was printed in Boys'…
“What baseball team would a dentist play for?”/“The Yanks.”
A New York Yankees ("Yanks") have had several dentist puns. "If a dentist played on a baseball team, which team would he play for? (...) The Yanks!" was printed in Boys'…
“What beef only comes in 2, 3, 5, 7, or 11 ounce portions?”/“Prime rib.”
Prime rib does not involved prime numbers, but there are jokes. "Of course, then you'll realise that you should be bridling every *prime* rib. 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13" was posted on…