“Teacher, teacher I declare I see someone’s underwear”
"Teacher, teacher" children's rhymes have existed since at least the first half of the 1900s. These were printed in The Journal of American Folk-lore in 1949: "Teacher, teacher,…
Alphebetical for "t"
“Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn’t do?” (joke)
A popular school joke has been printed on several images: Student: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?Teacher: Of course not.Student: Good, because I didn't do my…
“Teacher: ‘Is that a phone!?’ Me: ‘No. It’s my calculator.’”
Students are often not allowed to carry mobile phones in school. A joke is: TEACHER: Is that a phone!?STUDENT: No. It's my calculator. The joke went viral on Twitter on May 21, 2012.…
“Teacher: ‘Why are you late?’ Student: ‘Why does it matter? You still get paid, right?’”
A school conversation has been printed on several images: TEACHER: Why are you late?STUDENT: Why does it matter? You still get paid, right? The late student's snarky comment was posted on…
“Teacher: ‘You missed school yesterday, didn’t you?’ Pupil: ‘Not very much!’”
A pun about "missing" school is: TEACHER: You missed school yesterday, didn't you? PUPIL: Not very much! The joke has been printed in many newspapers since at least 1942. “Boss:…
“Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning” (joke)
A classic school joke is: Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.Class: Hooray!Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon. The joke has been cited in print…
“Teacher: Jeff, have you been copying Johnny’s test again?” (joke)
A popular school joke has a teacher discovering that one student had copied from another. All of the answers were identical except one, where one student wrote "I don't know" and the…
“Teacher: Name a book that made you cry. Me: Algebra.”
Teachers like to recommend books that involve students emotionally. However, books that "make students cry" might not be the best recommendations. "She: What was the last book that…
“Teacher: Name a book that made you cry. Me: Organic Chemistry.”
Teachers like to recommend books that involve students emotionally. However, books that "make students cry" might not be the best recommendations. "She: What was the last book that…
“Teacher: Open up to page 26” (joke)
"Teacher: Open up to page 26!" is the start of a joke that went viral on September 27, 2018. The teacher is instructing students to open up their books to page 26, but the joke has it…
“Teacher: There are two words I don’t allow in my class. One is gross and the other is cool” (joke)
Some people don't like the slang words "gross" and "cool," and there is a popular school joke about this. "An English professor announced to the class; 'There are…
“Teacher: What sound do pigs make? Student: FREEZE!”
"Pig" is slang for a policeman, and this is used in a popular joke. A teacher asks her class (Detroit is often the location), "What sound does a cat make?" "Meow!"…
“Teacher: Why are you late for class?” (school joke)
A school joke has been printed on several images: TEACHER: Tell the class why you're late.STUDENT: Someone told me to go to hell.STUDENT: Couldn't find it at first.STUDENT: But now…
“Teacher: Why are you late? Student: Class started before I got here.”
A school joke is: Teacher: Why are you late?Student: Class started before I got here. The student offers no explanation for lateness, but defines what lateness is. The joke has been cited in print…
“Teacher: You have the same mistakes as the person next to you. How could that happen?”
There's a school joke about the teacher who suspects a student of cheating: Teacher: You have the same mistakes as the person next to you. How could that happen?Student: We have the same…
“Teachers are sometimes like an alarm clock. They won’t shut up when you’re trying to sleep”
"Teachers are sometimes like an alarm clock. They won't shut up when you're trying to sleep" is a school saying that has been printed on several images. "Teachers are like…
“Teachers open the door, but you must enter by yourself”
"Teachers open the door; you enter by yourself" is a popular proverb that has been printed on many gift items, such as posters, T-shirts and bags. "Teachers open the door; you enter…
“Teachers should wear body cams like police so parents can see how their children act..”
"Teachers should wear body cams like police so parents can see how their children act.." is a saying that has been printed on many images. Usually, the first half of the saying would…
“Teachers tell us to follow our dreams, but get mad when we fall asleep in their class”
"Teachers always say follow your dreams. But when I fall asleep in class, they get mad at me for taking their advice" is a jocular line that was posted on Twitter by "brian with an…
“Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded”
A school pun about teachers taking attendance is: "Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded." The jocular line has been cited in print since at least 2004. Google Groups:…