“People think grass don’t be wet in the morning, but it dew”
"Dew" shouldn't be confused with "do," but there are jokes. "People don't think the grass be wet in the morning, but it dew" was posted on Twitter by…
Alphebetical for "p"
“People think I go out of my way to piss them off. Trust me, it’s not out of my way at all”
"People think I go out of my way to piss them off. Trust me, it's not out of my way at all" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Some people think I go out…
“People think of education as something they can finish”
"People think of education as something they can finish" is a saying that has been printed on GIFs. American author Isaac Asimov (1920-1992) said in a 1988 conversation with journalist…
“People treat New Year’s like some sort of life-changing event”
"People treat New Year's like some sort of life-changing event. If your life sucked last year, it's probably still going to suck tomorrow" is a jocular New Year's saying…
“People use ‘ASAP’ because they can’t spell ‘imijeatly’”
"ASAP" means "as soon as possible." This means "immediately," but who can spell that? "People only say ASAP because they can’t spell emedeeitly" was posted…
“People use ‘ASAP’ because they can’t spell ‘imijiately’”
"ASAP" means "as soon as possible." This means "immediately," but who can spell that? "People only say ASAP because they can’t spell emedeeitly" was posted…
“People use ‘ASAP’ because they can’t spell ‘immediately’”
"ASAP" means "as soon as possible." This means "immediately," but who can spell that? "People only say ASAP because they can’t spell emedeeitly" was posted…
“People use ‘ASAP’ because they can’t spell ‘immidateily’”
"ASAP" means "as soon as possible." This means "immediately," but who can spell that? "People only say ASAP because they can’t spell emedeeitly" was posted…
“People use ‘ASAP’ because they can’t spell ‘imijietili’”
"ASAP" means "as soon as possible." This means "immediately," but who can spell that? "People only say ASAP because they can’t spell emedeeitly" was posted…
“People used to cough to cover up a fart. Now they fart to cover up a cough!” (virus joke)
"Cough fart ... When someone coughs to hide a fart with devious intent" was entered in the Urban Dictionary on December 2, 2010. The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak reversed this.…
“People vote their resentment, not their appreciation”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: William B. MunroWilliam Bennett Munro (1875 – 1957) was a Canadian social scientist and eugenicist. 14 November 1923, Oregonian (Portland, OR), "Outlook…
“People who are enjoying lockdown have ‘stuck home’ syndrome”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to be stuck at home. "Stuck home syndrome" (for Stockholm syndrome) was a popular pun, although it had been used earlier. "In a…
“People who are quarantining in jeans: what are you trying to prove”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: 2019-20 coronavirus outbreakThe 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic is an ongoing global pandemic of coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19), caused by severe acute…
“People who aren’t nice to waiters aren’t nice people”
"A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person" was written by newspaper humor columnist Dave Barry in 1998. ""People who aren't nice to…
“People who argue over the price of bread in a kosher bakery are challah-cost deniers”
Challah is a bread of Ashkenazi Jewish origin. "What's the challah cost?" sounds like "What's the holocaust?", and there are jokes. "How much does that challah…
“People who ask ‘can I call you’ are so sweet. Like obviously you cannot but you’re so sweet for asking”
Many people like a text or an email -- anything but a telephone call, which requires immediate interaction. The innocent question "Can I call you?" is an obvious "no" answer,…
“People who back into parking spots are show-offs”
People who back into parking spots are a peeve for many other people. "I can't help but think people who back into parking spots are just showing off" was posted on Twitter by…
“People who back into parking spots just want attention”
People who back into parking spots are a peeve for many other people. "I can't help but think people who back into parking spots are just showing off" was posted on Twitter by…
“People who boast about how good they are at yoga can go fuck themselves”
Yoga can help someone gain flexibility. "People who do yoga can go fuck themselves" was posted on Twitter by Ducks on July 25, 2013. "People who always go on about how good they are…
“People who buy sex dolls are fucking dummies”
"Whoever called them Sex Dolls and not Fucking Dummies is a fucking dummy" is a joke that was posting on Twitter by Mischievous Mike on May 31, 2016. "I should just buy myself one of…