A "third degree burn" doesn't involve three college degrees, but a joke was posted on Reddit -- Dad Jokes on April 22, 2018: "My friend said, 'You have a BA, Masters and a…
People sometimes swallow coins, and it's one of the oldest of American puns: "My friend swallowed some coins and was taken to the hospital. I asked the nurse about his condition, but she…
A popular pun about the tv remote is: "My friend told me a joke about a TV controller. It wasn't remotely funny." "I told my TV controller a joke. It wasn't remotely…
"There's no fucking way" is sometimes given a pun with the word "whey." "There's no 'F' in 'whey'" was posted on Twitter by James Jillson…
Managers often make to-do lists. A joke was posted on Twitter on April 9, 2016: "My friend just used my to-do list to roll a joint... He's high on my list of priorities." "My…
"Texas" should not be confused with "text us," but there are jokes. This was posted by Jokerswild on X/Twitter on June 24, 2019: My mate phoned me and said "I'm in a…
The "NHS" (National Health Service in England) can sound like "any chess," and there are jokes. A popular hospital pun has been cited in print since at least March 2021. This…
"How a bill becomes a law" has been explained by the website Kids in the House. A 1976 Schoolhouse Rock song, "I'm Just a Bill," also explained the process. The site…
To say that something is "toast" means that it's a failure. A popular pun is: "My friend's bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast." "Did you…
The idiom "like shooting fish in a barrel" (meaning something that is extremely easy) shouldn't be confused with "shooting fish in apparel," but there are jokes. "My…
"My friends and I experimented with drugs and sex in high school. I was part of the control group" is a popular joke. The control group consists of people who do not get the drugs and…
A business pun was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on May 3, 2017: "My friends and I started a business where we weigh tiny items. It’s a small scale operation." The joke was posted several…
"My friends call me 'The Computer'. Nothing to do with intelligence, I go to sleep if left unattended for 15 minutes" was posted on Twitter by Ben on May 20, 2015.…
"My friends say I’m a pessimist. But I think it’s far worse than that...." is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Col on April 27, 2019. "My friend's say I'm a…
A business that goes into "liquidation" usually doesn't literally become liquid, but there are jokes. "My fruit and vegetable business has gone into liquidation. We now sell…
A business that goes into "liquidation" usually doesn't literally become liquid, but there are jokes. "My fruit and vegetable business has gone into liquidation. We now sell…
"Controller" sounds like "control her." A gamer joke was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on August 14, 2020: "My gamer girlfriend just left me...said I always tried to…
"My gauge is fine 'til the third glass of wine" is a saying that has been printed on a button. "My gauge is fine 'til the third glass of wine" was cited on Twitter on…
There's a difference between being a History teacher and being history. "That English teacher they sent up (into space and died -- ed.)? She is history now" was posted on Twitter on…
A joke about surveillance was posted on Twitter by Joe Mama on April 23, 2014, and has been printed on many images: "My girlfriend asked me last night why I carry my gun around the house, what…