"Good morning, Warren, and congratulations on once again not dying in your sleep…" is a jocular version of "good morning" that was posted on Twitter by Munsi on January 3,…
One disadvantage of speeding -- besides potentially getting a speeding ticket -- is that the driver might arrive at a destination too early. "I definitely learned my lesson about speeding…
"I've deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo" is a saying meaning that the speaker changes thoughts so often, something permanent (a tattoo on the…
"I've deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo" is a saying meaning that the speaker changes thoughts so often, something permanent (a tattoo on the…
A joke about a website's home page is: "I designed a website for orphans. There isn't a home page." The joke was posted on Twitter on April 15, 2015 and was originally posted on…
Many people believe that McDonald's (an American multinational fast food chain) is best for hamburgers, and not its fish sandwich. "I did a lot of dumb stuff but I never got a fish filet…
"I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words" os a jocular saying that has been printed on an ecard. The saying was on Twitter on February 24, 2011. Similar jokes…
"I did not hear the question, but the answer is definitely coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on several images. "I didn't really hear the question but I know the…
"I did not see that cumin" -- like the saying "I did not see that coming" -- is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "As a result of the oregano post, we…
Pilates (a type of mind-body exercise) shouldn't be confused with Roman governor Pontius Pilate, but there are jokes. "Pilates must be pretty tough exercise if they killed Jesus" was…
A "C" is a letter grade. "C" is a Roman numeral for 100. "Thank you sweet baby jesus i got a C on my roman history test :D" was posted on Twitter by Amanda Kramer on…
A classic failed pickup line -- and snarky response -- is: Man: Do you want to dance? Woman: No! Man: I think you misheard me. I said you look fat in those pants. The joke has been cited in print…
"Mayonnaise" can sound a bit like "my own eyes." "'I saw it with mayonnaise' '..What?' 'With my own eyes' #fakeaccentproblems" was posted…
"I didn't choose the mug life. The mug life chose me" is a jocular coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The pun is on the term "thug life." "I…
"I didn't claw my way to the top of the food chain to eat vegetables" was the newsgroup signature of Dwight Tovey in 1991; it is not known if he coined the phrase, which quickly…
"I didn't come this far to only come this far" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "From a FB friend: 'I didn't come this far, to only come…
"I never dreamed about success. I worked for it" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. American businessperson Estée Lauder (1908-2004) -- born Josephine Esther…
"I didn't misgender you, you misgendered you, and I refused to play along" is a transgender saying that has been printed on many images. "I didn’t misgender you! You…
“This ain’t my first rodeo” (or "This is not my first rodeo") is a popular saying. It is an expression that means "I wasn't born yesterday" (I'm not naive in…
Entry in progress -- BP FacebookColleen WatersOctober 15, 2021 at 4:57 AM · Friday , been a good girl all week not been fb banned (yet) but most likely still on the watch list 👀😇(The…