“If you lose a garden gnome, are you gnomeless?”
Many homes have garden gnomes. Homes that do not have them are "gnomeless." "It you lose a garden gnome are you gnomeless? #themoreyouknow" was posted on Twitter by The Knower…
Alphebetical for "i"
“If you lose, be patient. If you win, stay humble”
"If you lose, be patient. If you win, stay humble" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. "If you win stay humble, if you lose, put your head down and…
“If you love somebody, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be”
"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it is yours. If it doesn't, it was never yours to begin with" is a modern proverb. "If you love somebody, let them…
“If you love somebody, let them go. If they come back with tacos, it was meant to be”
"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it is yours. If it doesn't, it was never yours to begin with" is a modern proverb. "If you love somebody, let them…
“If you make 10,000 regulations you destroy all respect for the law”
"If you make 10,000 regulations you destroy all respect for the law" is a newly popular quotation that is credited to Winston Churchill (1874-1965). Churchill said the quotation before…
“If you make a salad dressing but don’t like it, you have vineregret”
"Vinaigrette" dressing is a somewhat confusing word. It is not "vineregret" (vine regret) -- except in jokes. "No wonder this salad was terrible... I used vineregret…
“If you make home fries whilst not at home, are they away fries?”
"Home fries" is a popular breakfast dish of fried potatoes, cut in chunks or wedges and usually served with onions. You can get "home fries" at restaurants (outside the home),…
“If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas”
Texas is a large state. "You measure distances in hours out here, not miles" was printed in the Austin (TX) American-Statesman on July 7, 1996. "You Know You're From A Small…
“If you miss the ball, don’t miss the leg” (soccer adage)
"If you missed the ball, don't miss the leg/man/bone" is a soccer adage popular in West African countries such as Ghana and Nigeria. The saying means that if you strike your leg out…
“If you mix butter and flour, you’ll roux the day”
"Roux" (a mixture of flour and fat) has resulted in many "roux the day" (roux + rue the day) puns. "Roux the day" has been cited in print since at least 1989, when it…
“If you mix garlic with a hallucinogenic, you’d get an Allicin Wonderland”
Allicin is an organosulfur compound obtained from garlic. "Allicin Wonderland" is an obvious pun on Alice in Wonderland. "The body is, in fact, a veritable allicin wonderland"…
“If you mix sodium, carbon, hydrogen, oxygen and sulfur together, what do you get? NaCHOS!”
Nachos are sometimes described by the elements Sodium (Na), Carbon (C), Hydrogen (H) and Oxygen (O), with Sulfur (S). "What do you get when you combine sodium (Na), carbon (C), hydrogen (H),…
“If you mix Tabasco in hand sanitizer, it will not only kill germs…”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to buy hand sanitizer. "If you’re having trouble keeping your hands away from your face and eyes just mix Tabasco in your hand…
“If you must burn our flag, please wrap yourself in it first”
"If you must burn our flag, please wrap yourself in it first" is a saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as bumper stickers and posters. The saying was a response to the…
“If you need a vaccine passport to ‘return to normal,’ you’re not returning to normal”
"Vaccine passports" were proposed in 2021 as a solution to "return to normal." "Just a reminder, if you need a vaccine passport to 'return to normal', you’re…
“If you need two yards, he’ll get you two yards…” (running back joke)
It's sometimes said of a powerful, short-yardage runner in football that, "If you need two yards, he'll get you two yards. If you need seven yards, he'll get you two…
“If you need violence to enforce your ideas, your ideas are worthless”
"If you need violence to enforce your ideas, your ideas are worthless" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "If you need violence to protect your ideas, your ideas are…
“If you need violence to protect your ideas, your ideas are worthless to begin with”
"If you need violence to enforce your ideas, your ideas are worthless" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "If you need violence to protect your ideas, your ideas are…
“If you needed a reason to unfriend me, I like pineapple on pizza”
Many people have strong feelings about pineapple as a pizza topping. "The only acceptable reason to unfriend someone is if they like pineapple pizza" was posted on Twitter by MicDre on…
“If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun”
"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun" is a saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as posters, T-shirts and wall plagues. The saying is almost always credited to…