“I’m not running away from hard work. I’m too lazy to run”
"I'm not running away from hard work. I'm too lazy to run" (or "I don't run away from hard work. I'm too lazy to run") is a saying that has been printed on…
Alphebetical for "i"
“I’m not saying I drink too much coffee, but I do believe my body will keep moving after death”
"I’m not saying I drink too much caffeine, but I do believe my body will keep moving 48 hours after my death" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I’m not…
“I’m not saying I live in a rough area, but I bought an Advent calendar and all the windows were boarded up”
An Advent calendar has windows, where people can open and have a treat such as a chocolate. This is the subject of several jokes. "I had an advent calendar from Woolworths actually...all the…
“I’m not saying I’m a bad cook, but how long is pasta supposed to stay in the toaster?”
Pasta doesn't cook in a toaster, but there are jokes about it. "I'm not particularly bad at cooking but how long is pasta supposed to stay in the toaster? http://bit.ly/ZO993o via…
“I’m not saying I’m old…but when I was in school we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas”
"I'm not saying I'm old...but when I was in school we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Making ashtrays was a popular…
“I’m not saying that my wife orders a lot from Amazon, I’m just saying that if I got a job as a UPS driver they’d probably let me work from home”
A wife order so much stuff online from Amazon.com, a joke goes, that a husband could get a job as an Amazon driver and work from home. "I’m thinking of getting a job as an Amazon driver..…
“I’m not saying that my wife orders a lot from Amazon, I’m just saying…”
Some people order a lot from an online service such as Amazon.com. This was posted on Twitter by Rodney Lacroix on October 14, 2022: "I'm not saying that my wife orders a lot from Amazon,…
“I’m not slow. I’m just getting my money’s worth from the entry fee”
"I'm not slow. I'm just getting my money's worth from the entry fee" is a jocular running saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on…
“I’m not speeding, I’m qualifying” (bumper sticker)
"I'm not speeding, I'm qualifying" is a bumper sticker saying that has been printed on many images. "Bumper talk: 'I'm not speeding/I'm…
“I’m not strange. I’m dramatically different”
"We're not strange. We're dramatically different" and "I'm not strange. I'm dramatically different" and "We are not strange. We are dramatically…
“I’m not sure how many cookies it takes to be happy, but so far it’s not twenty seven”
"I'm not sure how many cookies it takes to be happy, but so far it's not twenty seven" is a cookie saying that has been printed on many images. The jocular saying was posted on…
“I’m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them”
"I'm not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them" is a jocular line that has been printed on T-shirts and ecards. "I'm not sure how many problems I have…
“I’m not sure how people get eaten by sharks. I mean, how do you not hear the music?”
The movie Jaws (1975) features an Academy Award-winning score by American composer John Williams. "I'm not sure how people get eaten by sharks. I mean, how do you not hear the…
“I’m not sure if this woman in the Starbucks line ahead of me is ordering a drink or casting a spell”
Ordering coffee can be a mystifying experience. "Ordering Starbucks is a lot like casting wizard spells. You must speak the words of power correctly, lest you get unintended…
“I’m not sure sure if it’s the thyme or the plaice” (joke)
"I'm not sure if it's the thyme (time) or the plaice (place)" is a popular food pun. "This is neither the thyme nor the plaice" was posted to the newsgroup…
“I’m not the manager because I’m always right, but I’m always right because I’m the manager”
California Angels manager Gene Mauch (1925-2005) said in 1985, "I'm not the manager because I'm always right, but I'm always right because I'm the manager." The…
“I’m not unemployed—I’m a consultant”
"I'm not unemployed -- I'm a consultant" is a popular T-shirt saying. A consultant can be in a self-employed, one-person business. Employment for a consultant can be irregular,…
“I’m not unemployed, I’m NSFW”
"I'm not unemployed, I'm NSFW" -- NSFW means "Not Safe For Work" -- is a jocular one-line work saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on…
“I’m not voting Democrat or Republican. I do not negotiate with terrorists”
"I'm not voting Democrat or Republican. I do not negotiate with terrorists" (shown on an ecard by Someecards) was posted on Facebook by People's Uprising on October 14, 2012.…
“I’m not voting. I don’t negotiate with terrorists”
"I'm not voting Democrat or Republican. I do not negotiate with terrorists" (shown on an ecard by Someecards) was posted on Facebook by People's Uprising on October 14, 2012.…