“I may be fat, but you’re ugly and I can diet”
"I may be fat, but you're ugly and I can diet" is a humorous saying that's been printed on gift items such as T-shirts, buttons and coffee mugs. The saying is similar to an…
Alphebetical for "i"
“I may be quarantined, but my boobs have never been freer”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in home quarantines. Many women did not wear bras. "I may be quarantined, but my boobs have never been freer" is a saying that has been printed…
“I may be ugly, but I fuck like the government”
"I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like the government" (or "I may be ugly, but I fuck like the government") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I may…
“I may forget a lot of things, but drinking coffee will never be one of them”
"I may forget a lot of things, but drinking coffee will never be one of them" is a coffee saying that has been printed on several images. "These days I forget a lot of things but…
“I may look like a potato now, but one day I’ll turn into fries and you’ll all want me then”
"I may look like a potato now, but one day I'll turn into fries and you'll all want me then" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship probably comes…
“I may love to shop, but I’m not buying your bullshit”
"I may love to shop, but I'm not buying your bullshit" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter by JAY STRUT on May 1,…
“I may not be a 10 on the beach, but I’m a solid 8 at Walmart”
"I may/might not be a 10 on the beach, but I'm a solid 8 at Walmart" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The people who shop at Walmart are usually not highly…
“I may not be a great cook, but I did just put a towel over my shoulder like I’m on the Food Network”
A cooking joke has it that the speaker has never been on a cooking show, but the speaker can cook something simple (like maybe boil water) and put a kitchen towel over the shoulder. Impressive,…
“I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like the government”
"I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like the government" (or "I may be ugly, but I fuck like the government") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I may…
“I may not be perfect or very good or adequate, but I return shopping carts to their appropriate location”
Returning a shopping cart feels like doing a civic duty, displaying a person's good character. This was posted on X/Twitter by Han Solo Cup on November 9, 2023, and it received over 1,100…
“I may not be totally sane, but at least all my personalities agree that coffee is amazing”
"I may not be totally sane, but at least all (of) my personalities agree that coffee is amazing" is a jocular coffee saying that has been printed on many images "It may not be…
“I may not be totally sane, but at least all of my personalities agree that coffee is amazing”
"I may not be totally sane, but at least all (of) my personalities agree that coffee is amazing" is a jocular coffee saying that has been printed on many images "It may not be…
“I may not have a hot body, but I have a hot bucket of fried chicken, so who’s the real winner here”
"You may have a hot body, but I have a hot bucket of fried chicken, so who's the real winner here" (or "I may not have a hot body, but I have a hot bucket of fried chicken, so…
“I mean, yeah, I could probably live without coffee, but…”
"I mean, yeah, I could probably live without coffee, but I wouldn’t wish that science experiment on anyone" was posted on Twitter by The Real American Dadass on May 13, 2018. The…
“I met a drunk ventriloquist who said she wanted to sleep with me…” (joke)
“'This may be the wine talking' – Drunk Ventriloquist" is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Steve on August 18, 2014. "I met a drunk ventriloquist who said she wanted to…
“I met a girl at a soccer game. I think she’s a keeper”
"She's a keeper" means that a person has found a good person for a partnership. "Keeper" in soccer (association football) means a "goalkeeper." "#manrules if…
“I met my ex-wife at the gym. We didn’t work out”
There's a difference between "workout" and "work out," and there's a pun: "I met my ex-wife down at the gym. We didn't workout." The joke was cited on…
“I met my girlfriend at an African language class. We just clicked!”
The African Khoisan languages share click consonants. "Met a lovely lady at my Khoisan language class. Amazing how we just clicked" was posted on Twitter by Tom Fox on October 24, 2014.…
“I met my wife on the net. We were bad trapeze artists”
The internet is often called simply "the net." A joke by Milton Jones was posted on Twitter on August 14, 2012: "My parents met on the net. They were both rubbish trapeze…
“I met my wife on Tinder. That was awkward”
Tinder is an American online dating website. "I met my wife on Tinder" could mean success -- the person's Tinder date resulted in a marriage. However, the line is used as a joke,…