“Dismay: to insult the fifth month”
The word "dismay" has nothing to do with the month of May, but there are jokes. "Dismay: To insult the 5th month" was posted on the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on March 23, 2005.…
Alphebetical for "d"
“Disney World is like a huge people trap that is operated by a mouse”
"Disneyland/Disney World is a people trap set by a mouse" is a joke that has been printed on many images. Disneyland opened in California in 1955; Disney World was opened in Florida in…
“Dissent is the highest form of patriotism”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikiquote: Thomas JeffersonThomas Jefferson (13 April 1743 – 4 July 1826) was the third president of the United States (1801–1809), author of the Declaration of…
“Distilled water is just cooked water”
Distilled water is said to be "cooked" water -- with all of the minerals boiled out of it. "@ChristinaNewman a sad thing about D h2o is that all life & vitality is cooked out of…
“Distrust every enterprise that requires new clothes”
"Distrust every enterprise that requires new clothes" is a paraphrase of what American author Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) wrote in Walden: or Life in the Woods (1854): "I say,…
“Divided by distance, united by memes”
"Divided by distance, united by memes" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Divided by distance United by meme..!" was posted on Twitter by Anjali..! on August 18,…
“Divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet”
American comedian and actor Robin Williams (1951-2014) said: "Ah yes, divorce, from that Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." It's uncertain when…
“Dixie” or “Dixie’s Land” (1859)
The song "Dixie Land" was written by Daniel Decatur Emmett and performed at Bryant's Minstrels at 472 Broadway, New York City, on April 4, 1859. Emmett had included the name…
“DNT TXT N DRV” (bumper sticker)
"DNT TXT N DRV" ("Don't Text and Drive") is a safety saying that has been printed on many different items. The state of California created the "DNT TX N DRIVE"…
“Do anybody else’s kids stand in front of the refrigerator with the door open looking at everything inside, and then ask you what is in the fridge?”
Many people stand in front of the refrigerator, with the door open. It often does not make food decisions any easier. "I'll stand in front of the refrigerator with the door open, eating a…
“Do biscuits websites use cookies?”
An "HTTP cookie" is not something that's eaten, but there have been several jokes. A popular joke translates American "cookies" to British "biscuits." Another…
“Do burlesque shows have undress rehearsals?”
Many theatrical productions have dress rehearsals. Does a nude performance hold an "undress rehearsal"? "Undress Rehearsal-Burlesque" was the title of a painting reported in a…
“Do buses and trains run on time?”/“Buses run on wheels and trains run on the tracks.”
A riddle about buses and trains running "on time" is: Q: Do buses and trains run on time?A: Buses run on wheels and trains run on the tracks. The joke was posted on Twitter on September…
“Do buses and trains run on time?”/“Buses run on wheels and trains run on the tracks.”
A riddle about buses and trains running "on time" is: Q: Do buses and trains run on time?A: Buses run on wheels and trains run on the tracks. The joke was posted on Twitter on September…
“Do cannibals refer to homeless people as free range?”
"Do cannibals refer to homeless people as free range?" is a jocular question that is usually asked with other cannibal jokes. "Do Cannibals refer to homeless people as Free Range?…
“Do deer like cheese?”/“Fawn do.”
"Fondue" sounds a bit like "fawn do," and there are jokes. "Most deer don't eat cheese for dinner, but fawn do" was posted on Twitter by Marty Flanagan on April…
“Do dragons enjoy playing offices and accountants?”
Dungeons and Dragons is a fantasy tabletop role-playing game. Offices & Bosses is another role-playing game. "If we play D&D...do Dragons play 'Offices & Humans' in their…
“Do history exams get harder every year?”
"Do history exams get harder every year?" is a jocular one-liner. After each year, there is more history to learn! "I feel sorry for each new generation of students,since history…
“Do holy cows give pastorized milk?”
"Pasteurized milk" has nothing to do with pastors, but there are jokes. "Pastorised Milk #Religiousfoods" was posted on Twitter by Marc Lemezma on November 23, 2009.…
“Do I dislike orange flavoured liqueurs? On the cointreaury”
Cointreau is a brand of orange-flavoured triple sec liqueur produced in Saint-Barthélemy-d'Anjou, France. "On the cointreaury" is a pun of "on the contrary." "on the…