“Call me a taxi.”/“You’re a taxi!”
"Call me a cab" is such an old joke, it pre-dates the popular introduction of the word "taxi." It's now most frequently "Call me a taxi"/"You're a…
Alphebetical for "c"
“Call me an Uber.”/“You’re an Uber!”
"Call me a taxi."/"You're a taxi!" is an old joke. Uber is a global taxi technology company. American journalist James Lileks wrote in the StarTribune (Minneapolis, MN) on…
“Call me anything, but don’t call me late for dinner”
"Call me anything you like, but don't call me too late for/to dinner" is an old joke that has been cited in print since at least 1833. A farce by Richard Jones called Too Late for…
“Call me butter because I’m on a roll”
"Call me/him/us butter because I'm/he's/we're on a roll" is a saying cited in print since at least 1999. The pun is for "on a roll" meaning both "on a…
“Call me cornbread… cause soon as you start moving iffy I’mma be gone in a jiffy”
X/Twitter PoisonLovee🌈❤️ @Girlswagg14 Call me cornbread cause soon as you start moving iffy I'mma be gone in a jiffy 🏃🏾♂️💨 9:58 PM · Aug 1, 2023 X/Twitter…
“Call me weird but I like all my money facing the same way”
"Call me weird but I like all my money facing the same way" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Many people adjust the bills in their wallets to face the same way. "I…
“Call them ‘Armadillos’ because the team gets killed on the road”
Many sports team don't play very well on the road. Many animals get killed on the road. A joke began in 1991 that a team was going to change its name to the Possums because "they play…
“Called my stockbroker this morning and asked him what I should be buying…..he said canned goods”
"Called my stockbroker this morning and asked him what I should be buying? He said, "Canned goods and ammunition'" is a saying that has been printed on several images. That is,…
“Called my stockbroker this morning and asked him what should I be buying? He said, ‘Canned goods’”
"Called my stockbroker this morning and asked him what I should be buying? He said, "Canned goods and ammunition'" is a saying that has been printed on several images. That is,…
“Calling All Men,” “Select, Don’t Settle,” “No Bunk. No Junk. No Imitations” (Barney’s)
Barney's clothing store has had a few slogans. "No bunk. No junk. No imitations" was the first one, from 1923-24. "Calling all men...to Barney's" is its famous sloagn…
“Calling children strong and able—clear your dishes off the table”
"Calling children strong and able -- clear your/the dishes off the table" is a saying that has been in print since at least 2006. The saying has been put on various gift items and has…
“Calling it a ‘beer run’ implies exercise, but calling it ‘beer mission’ implies importance”
Should it be called a "beer run" or a "beer mission"? This was posted on Twitter by Bud Light on May 21, 2022: "Calling it a 'beer run' implies exercise, but…
“Calling your life a journey doesn’t make it any less of a disaster”
“Calling your life a journey doesn’t make it any less of a disaster” was posted on Twitter by Eva on February 15, 2018. It's not known who originated the saying. It's often stated…
“Calories (noun)—Tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes tighter”
"Calories (noun) - Tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes a little bit tighter every night" is a jocular definition that has been printed on many images. "What…
“Calories in one pistachio: 4. Calories burned opening one pistachio: 3,146. Take that, kale”
"Calories in one pistachio: 4. Calories burned opening one pistachio: 3,146. Take that, kale" is a ocular saying that has been printed on many images. Pistachios have shells that can be…
“Calves for the chavs” (weightlifting sayng)
Entry in progress -- B.P. "Curls for the girls" is a similar saying that has been cited in print since at least 1981. Other weightlifting sayings include "benches for the…
“Calzones are just Italian burritos”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Reddit -- Shower ThoughtsCalzones are essentially just Italian burritos.submitted August 24, 2014 by RustinCh0le Reddit -- Shower ThoughtsCalzones are like Italian…
“Calzones are just Italian empanadas”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Reddit -- Shower ThoughtsCalzones are like Italian burritossubmitted November 21, 2016 by drunk_opinion_altCOMMENTSHamPlanetJanetNot quite. Burrito is rolled to close it…
“Camera catches looters stealing trillions” (Congress joke)
"Camera catches looters stealing trillions" (with a photo of the Congress of the United States) has been printed on many images. "Camera Catches Looters Stealing Trillions"…
“Camper: Is it easy to milk a cow? Farmer: Sure it is. Any jerk can do it.”
A joke about milking a cow is: CAMPER: Is it easy to milk a cow? FARMER: Sure it is. Any jerk can do it. The "jerk" pun has been cited in print since at least 1970. 26 June 1970, Morning…