“Giving a fuck doesn’t really go with my outfit today”
"Giving a fuck doesn't go with my outfit" (or "Giving a fuck doesn't really go with my outsift today") is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has…
“Life is too precious to be sleeping with someone who trusts the government”
"Life is too precious/short to be sleeping with someone who trusts the government" is an anti-government saying that has been printed on several images. "Life is too precious to be…
“Life is too short to be sleeping with someone who trusts the government”
"Life is too precious/short to be sleeping with someone who trusts the government" is an anti-government saying that has been printed on several images. "Life is too precious to be…
“If a package of bacon isn’t resealable, it contains one serving”
"If a bag is not resealable then it contains one serving. I don’t make the rules" and "If a bacon package isn't resealable, it contains one serving. That's science. I…
“To avoid straining your eyes at work, use the 30-30 rule. After 30 minutes of work, quit your job…”
"To avoid straining your eyes at work, use the 30-30 rule. After 30 minutes of work, quit your job and buy a 30 acre farm in the middle of nowhere" is a jocular work saying that has been…
“My student friend says he’s studying forensics…” (joke)
"Forensics" sounds like "four and six," and there are jokes. "Forensics: FORENSICS is ten. (Gary Hallock)" is a jocular definition that was posted on the newsgroup…
“Science should stop analyzing animal intelligence and start studying human stupidity”
"Science/Scientists should stop analyzing animal intelligence and start studying human stupidity" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "La ciencia debería de dejar de…
“Scientists should stop studying animal intelligence and start studying human stupidity”
"Science/Scientists should stop analyzing animal intelligence and start studying human stupidity" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "La ciencia debería de dejar de…
“Whenever a waiter asks me how I want my steak, I always say ‘free’”
Waiters ask how a diner would like a steak to be cooked, such as "rare" or "medium" or "well done." A joke on this was published by John Wagner’s Maxine comic…
“I love Mexican food them chicken case of ideas be so good fr”
"Quesadillas" is sometimes joked as "case of ideas." "I fuck wit Mexican food them chicken case of ideas be good as hell" was posted on Facebook by Dee Grape on August…
“Before 1913 we got 100% of our paycheck”
"Before 1913 we got 100% of our paycheck" is a saying against the Federal Reserve Bank (founded in 1913). The Federal Reserve System has devalued the currency, and a dollar in 1913 was…
“Life is like a door, never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim”
"Life is like a door, never trust a cow because the sun can't swim" is a nonsensical saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that life doesn't always make…
“Life is like a chair, never trust a bird because the rock”
"Life is like a door, never trust a cow because the sun can't swim" is a nonsensical saying that has been printed on many images. The saying means that life doesn't always make…
“Scientists should stop analyzing animal intelligence and start studying human stupidity”
"Science/Scientists should stop analyzing animal intelligence and start studying human stupidity" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "La ciencia debería de dejar de…
“I like to have at least 5 practice beers before I have my actual beer”
"I like to have at least 5 practice beers before I have my actual beer" (or "I like to have at least 5 practice beers before having my actual first beer") is a jocular beer…
“I like to have at least 5 practice beers before having my actual first beer”
"I like to have at least 5 practice beers before I have my actual beer" (or "I like to have at least 5 practice beers before having my actual first beer") is a jocular beer…
“Are there doctors in New York since it’s called the Big Apple?”
“An apple a day keeps the doctor away” is a famous saying. New York City is called the "Big Apple." "there are no doctors in New York because it’s the Big Apple" was…
“Never make fun of someone if they mispronounce a word. It means they learned it by reading”
"Never make fun of someone if they mispronounce a word. It means they learned it by reading" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "One of my fave most inspirational…
“Corporations can buy unfair favors from government…because government has unfair favors to sell”
"Corporations can buy unfair favors from government...because government has unfair favors to sell. Big government is the problem. THISISCOMMONSENSE.COM" was posted on Facebook by Common…
“When my Swiss friends send me cheese, I get sad and miss them terribly. I know I’m being sent Emmental”
Emmental is a yellow, medium-hard cheese that originated in Emmen, Switzerland. It's sometimes joked that one is being "sent Emmental" (sentimental). "pretty gutted i never get…