“I don’t need Google. My boyfriend knows everything!”
"I don't need Google. My boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife knows everything!" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I don't need Google because my wife…
“What’s the best way to eat a hot dog?”/“With relish.”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterFoodies' Night In@FoodiesNiteInQ5. With RELISH... Best way to finish a hot dog? Pickled veg faves? Spicy ethnic spins? Grilled or raw onions? #FNIchat3:24…
“Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you’re drunk”
"Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you're drunk" is a saying -- referring to the story Cinderella, or The Little Glass Slipper -- that has been printed on…
“Of course women don’t work as hard as men. They get it right the first time”
"Of course women don't work as hard as men. They get it right the first time" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. "Says of course men don't work as hard…
“What if algebra teachers are really pirates and they are using us to find ‘X’?”
"What if algebra teachers are really pirates and they are using us to find 'X' so they can find the treasure?" is a math joke that has been printed on many images. The joke was…
“Why did the cannibal leave the restaurant?”/“Because he got cold feet”
To "get cold feet" means to be nervous or anxious about an upcoming event. The expression has been used in several cannibal jokes. "When my mate Barry was invited to a cannibal…
“How much space do fungi need to grow?”/“As mushroom as possible.”
A mushroom pun has been printed on several images: Q: How much space do fungi need to grow?A: As mushroom as possible. "How much room is needed for fungi to grow? As mushroom as possible"…
“If you see a rabbit laying little brown eggs, don’t eat them. It’s not chocolate”
"If you see a rabbit laying little brown eggs, don't eat them. It's not chocolate" is a jocular saying that has been a Minions quote. The popular Easter saying was posted on…
“What’s the difference between USA and USB?” (joke)
A popular computer riddle is: Q: What's the difference between USA and USB?A: One connects to all of your devices and accesses the data, and the other is a hardware standard. The joke was…
“A black man, a Jew, and an Asian walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An anti-joke version is: "A black man, a Jew, and an Asian walk into a bar. This is an…
“A horse walks into a bar…” (bar anti-joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A popular version involving a horse is: "A horse walks into a bar and the barman says,…
“There is no life without water because water is needed to make coffee”
"There is no life without water because water is needed to make coffee" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The coffee meme became popular on July 4, 2012.…
“Pros and cons of making food: Pros=food Cons=making”
"Pros and cons of making food: Pros=food Cons=making" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. The one-liner was posted on Twitter on September 15, 2013.…
“Why don’t blind people go skydiving?”/“Because it scares the hell out of their dogs.”
A riddle about the sport of skydiving is: Q: Why don't blind people go skydiving?A: Because it scares the hell out of their dogs. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1989. Google…
“There’s no life without water. Without water, there’s no coffee. Without coffee, I’ll kill you all”
"There is no life on earth without water. Because without water, there is no coffee. And without coffee, I'll kill you all" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
“I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge”
"I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge" is a jocular one-liner that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on March 10, 2011. TwitterVal G@valmanI…
“Two clowns are eating a cannibal” (joke)
“Why don’t cannibals eat clowns?"/"Because they taste funny!” is a classic joke. "Met someone today who accidentally started the joke 'Two clowns are eating a…
“What’s a pirate’s least favorite letter?” (computer piracy joke)
A sea pirate's favorite letter might be "R." "What's a pirate's least favorite letter?" is the subject of a computer piracy joke. "I think a pirate's…
“Promises and pie crust are made to be broken”
Entry in progress -- B.P. (Oxford English Dictionary)piecrust, n.In proverbial and allusive use, with reference to a promise that is easily or casually broken.1681 Heraclitus Ridens 16 Aug. v/1 He…
“I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry”
"I'm sorry for what I said when I was hungry" is a one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was first posted on Twitter on April 11, 2012. TwitterGeneva…