“It was so cold that I saw a chicken with a cape on”
"Capon" sounds like "cape on." "It's so cold out there today, I saw a chicken with a cape on" is a joke that was printed in a 1976 newspaper. "It was so cold…
“Why did the gamer cross the road?”/“Buy the DLC to find out.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A gamer version is: Q: Why did the gamer cross the road?A: Buy the…
“How did the vegan fix her flat?”/“A spare I guess.”
"A spare I guess" for "asparagus" is a pun that has been printed on several images. A bowling "spare" asparagus pun is the most popular. "The joke will have…
“Private Parking. Unauthorized vehicles will be worked over with a sledgehammer…”
A jocular sign about parking has been cited in print since at least 2004 and printed on several images: "PRIVATE PARKING UNAUTHORIZED VEHICLES WILL BE WORKED OVER WITH A SLEDGEHAMMER, FLIPPED…
“Why did the console gamer cross the road?”/“To render the buildings on the other side.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A gamer version is: Q: Why did the console gamer cross the road?A: To…
“What did the bowling vegetable get on that last frame?”/“A spare, I guess.”
"A spare I guess" for "asparagus" is a pun that has been printed on several images. A bowling "spare" asparagus pun is the most popular. "The joke will have…
“Why did the gamer cross the road?”/“Buy the DLC to find out.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A gamer version is: Q: Why did the gamer cross the road?A: Buy the…
“Why did the console gamer cross the road?”/“To render the buildings on the other side.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. A gamer version is: Q: Why did the console gamer cross the road?A: To…
“What did the bowling vegetable get on that last frame?”/“A spare, I guess.”
"A spare I guess" for "asparagus" is a pun that has been printed on several images. A bowling "spare" asparagus pun is the most popular. "The joke will have…
“What do you call a disobedient kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?”/“A rebel without a Claus.”
A Christmas riddle is: Q: What do you call a disobedient kid who doesn't believe in Santa?A: A rebel without a Claus. The pun is on the film Rebel Without a Cause (1955). The Santa riddle was…
“Why do chemists like nitrates so much?”/“They’re cheaper than day rates.”
A chemistry riddle is: Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?A: They're cheaper than day rates. The "nitrate"/"night rate" pun has been cited in print since at least…
“What is copper nitrate?”/“Overtime for policemen.”
Police are sometimes called "coppers." A chemistry riddle is: Q: What is copper nitrate?A: Overtime for policemen. The "copper night rate" joke has been cited in print since at…
“What do you call a frozen dog?”/“A pupsicle.”
A dog riddle is: Q: What do you call a frozen dog?A: A pupsicle. Forms of the "pupsicle" (pup + popsicle) riddle have been cited in print since at least 1965. 7 July 1965, Honolulu (HI)…
“What gets bigger the more you take from it?”/“The lower class.”
"What gets bigger the more you take from it?" is a popular riddle. "A pit" or "an excavation" or "a hole" has been the answer since at least 1824.…
“Which animals make potholes?”/“Rodents.”
"Rodents" sounds like "road dents." "Exterminators call pot holes 'road dents!!!'" was posted on Twitter on February 2, 2010. "Guys, be careful when you…
“At work, when you don’t know what to do, just walk fast and look worried”
"When you don’t know what to do, just walk fast and look worried" is a work saying that has been printed on several images, including a Dilbert comic strip. Paul Dickson wrote in The…
“Better days are coming. They are called Saturday and Sunday”
"Better days are coming. They are called Saturday and Sunday" is a jocular work saying that has been printed on many images. "Cheer up. Better days are coming. They're called…
“If you’re not satisfied with your life, do something about it. Or complain on the internet”
Does complaining on the internet accomplish anything? "If you're bothered about stuff in your life, get up and do something about it. Or sit down and complain about it on the internet.…
“All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and more pay for not getting it done”
"All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and more pay for not getting it done" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "What most folks are seeking these days is less…
“How many frat boys does it take to change a lightbulb?”/“None, they prefer Natural Light.”
There have been several versions of fraternities and beer in the traditional lightbulb joke. This is from 1984: Q: How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: Three: One to screw it…