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"I'm really tired of eating the same shit, but ain't no new animals coming out" was posted on X/Twitter by Musically_Inclined on March 28, 2017. "I'm really tired of…
A fortune cookie joke was posted on Facebook by Deidrè de Saldanha (and many others) on June 19, 2012: "Best Fortune cookie ever: 'Person expecting sound advice from stale cookie…
"These days you gotta have a job for the bills and another job for yourself" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the economy is so bad, people need two jobs just to…
"These days you gotta have a job for the bills and another job for yourself" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the economy is so bad, people need two jobs just to…
McDonald's specializes in hamburgers. Salads are an afterthought and McDonald's sells very few of them. "Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a crack house for…
McDonald's specializes in hamburgers. Salads are an afterthought and McDonald's sells very few of them. "Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a crack house for…
"We interrupt your happiness (and positivity) to bring you Monday (morning). Your regularly scheduled happiness (and positivity) will resume on Friday" is a saying that has been printed…
"Coffee (n.): A magical substance that turns 'Leave me alone or die' into 'Good morning, honey!'" (or "Coffee (n.): A dark magical substance that turns…
"i run on coffee and dreams" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The saying became popular in 2024. "i run on coffee and dreams" was posted on X/Twitter by…
"i run on coffee and dreams" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The saying became popular in 2024. "i run on coffee and dreams" was posted on X/Twitter by…
At a pool, young adults often throw others into the pool. It is usually meant to be harmless fun. "If i get pushed in a pool this summer I’m not swimming back up, enjoy ya murder charge…
"Shut up. You're not seizing the day. Nobody seizes a Tuesday. Psychopath" is a Tuesday saying that has been printed on many images. "Seize the day" (carpe diem) is a Latin…
Many people believe that when you're cooking, the smoke detector shouldn't go off. "Billion dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell 'I'm just…
Many people believe that when you're cooking, the smoke detector shouldn't go off. "Billion dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell 'I'm just…
Many people believe that when you're cooking, the smoke detector shouldn't go off. "Billion dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell 'I'm just…
"If we get rid of all the margarine, the world would be a butter place" is a jocular saying, with a pun on "the world would be a better place." Authorship is unknown. "Now…
It's an old proverb that people should learn from the mistakes of other people. "I learn from the mistakes of people who take/took my advice" is a jocular saying that has been…
"Let's get the day started with a nice big bowl of why the fuck am I awake" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Many people do not like mornings and want to sleep more.…
"Handkerchief" shouldn't be confused with "anchor chief," but there are jokes. "What do sailor's use to blow their noses? Anchor-chiefs" was posted on…
"Why doctors offices be like get there 15 minutes early why you're not even about to get seen until 45 minutes after your appointment time? 😡" was posted on X/Twitter by treena on…