“I’ve reached the age where I appreciate a nice handrail”
"I've reached the age where I appreciate a nice handrail" (or "I'm at the age where I appreciate a nice handrail") is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
Search
Searched for . Search results: 41176
“My doctor said I need to eat more greens, so I’m switching to mint chocolate chip ice cream”
People are sometimes advised to eat more “greens” (such as vegetables). Mint chocolate ice cream -- which is "green" -- is usually not part of that diet, but there are jokes. "My…
“Heaven will not ever Heaven be, unless my dog is there to welcome me”
The poem "My Dog Is Dead" by F. D. Huntington was printed in the New York (NY) Times on October 14, 1925. The last two lines are: "No -- Heaven will not ever Heaven be Unless my dog…
“A dog is one of the few things in life that is exactly what it seems”
"A dog is one of the few things in life that is exactly what it seems" (or "A dog is one of the few things in life that is as it seems" is a saying about dogs that has been…
“A dog is one of the few things in life that is as it seems”
"A dog is one of the few things in life that is exactly what it seems" (or "A dog is one of the few things in life that is as it seems" is a saying about dogs that has been…
“To err is human. To forgive, canine”
"Errāre hūmānum est" is classical Latin fo "to err is human" (that is, we all make mistakes). "To err is human; to forgive, divine" is from An Essay on Criticism…
“Eggnog is perfect for when you feel like drinking a glass of pancake batter”
Some people do not like eggnog. "@RichieRahRah hubby asked me what was in eggnog last night, and I had no idea! Looks like pancake batter in a glass, so i avoid it" was posted on…
“Every single person who confuses correlation and causation ends up dying”
"Correlation does not imply causation" is a popular phase. "Every single person who confuses correlation and causation ends up dying" (also "Everyone who confuses…
“100% of people who confuse correlation with causation end up dead”
"Correlation does not imply causation" is a popular phase. "Every single person who confuses correlation and causation ends up dying" (also "Everyone who confuses…
“Everyone who confuses correlation with causation eventually ends up dead”
"Correlation does not imply causation" is a popular phase. "Every single person who confuses correlation and causation ends up dying" (also "Everyone who confuses…
“I won’t use someone’s pronouns for the same reason I won’t talk to a schizophrenic’s imaginary friends”
"I won't use someone's pronouns for the same reason I won't talk to a schizophrenic's imaginary friends" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker…
“I don’t care who likes me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me”
"I don't care what anyone thinks of me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I don't care what anyone thinks of me.…
“I don’t care what anyone thinks of me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me”
"I don't care what anyone thinks of me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I don't care what anyone thinks of me.…
“I’d rather be beered and cheered than wined and dined”
"Beer and cheer" is a term like "wine and dine." "They were wined, dined, beered and cheered each day of their drill" was printed in the Morning World-Herald (Omaha,…
“Beer and cheer” (similar to “wine and dine”)
"Beer and cheer" is a term like "wine and dine." "They were wined, dined, beered and cheered each day of their drill" was printed in the Morning World-Herald (Omaha,…
“Safety meeting at work. They asked me, what steps would you take in event of a fire?” (joke)
What steps does one take in the event of a fie? "RT @FunnyJoker: In the event of a fire what steps would you take?.....Fucking big ones" was posted on X/Twitter by SlightlySick™ on…
“In the event of a fire, what steps should you take?”/“Really, really BIG ones!”
What steps does one take in the event of a fie? "RT @FunnyJoker: In the event of a fire what steps would you take?.....Fucking big ones" was posted on X/Twitter by SlightlySick™ on…
“I went to Dan’s cafe, but was put off by the non-stop George Michael music. I’m never going to Dan’s again”
A joke on George Michael's song "Careless Whisper" (1984) was posted on Facebook by Tom Whiteman on July 3, 2018: "I popped in to a place called Dan's Cafe for a bite to…
“The lid of the Dijon mustard came off inside our picnic basket. Now there’s Poupon everything”
"There is Poupon everything" -- a joke on "poop on everything" -- is a saying that has been printed on many images. Grey Poupon is a brand of Dijon mustard which originated in…
“There is Poupon everything”
"There is Poupon everything" -- a joke on "poop on everything" -- is a saying that has been printed on many images. Grey Poupon is a brand of Dijon mustard which originated in…