“May your soul be in heaven before the devil knows you’re dead” (toast)
"May your soul be in heaven before the devil knows you're dead" is an old Irish toast of uncertain origin. ""May yer sowl be in glory a fortnight before the divil knows…
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“An Irishman can argue either side of a question, often at the same time”
"An Irishman can argue either side of a question, often at the same time" is a jocular one-line saying that has been credited to Los Angeles (CA) Times sportswriter Jim Murray…
“Whale oil beef hooked” (How to speak Irish in one easy lesson)
"Whale oil beef hooked" are words that have been printed on many images. Supposedly, it's a joke of how an Irish persons says, "Well, I'll be fucked." The words have…
“I have the right to remain silent, but I don’t have the ability”
A Miranda warning is given by law enforcement officers, telling an accused that he or she has the right to remain silent. American stand up comedian and actor Ron White wrote a book, I Had the…
“Here’s to our wives and girlfriends—may they never meet!” (toast)
A Royal Navy toast from the 1800s is: "May our wives always be our sweethearts and our sweethearts always become our wives." A jocular version of the toast has been cited in print since…
“What kind of water do you put into a waterbed?”/“Spring water.”
A riddle about spring water is: Q: What kind of water do you put into a waterbed?A: Spring water. "So, spring water at the grocery store. That's for your water bed right?" was posted…
“Standing closer to me in line will not get you to the checkout faster”
A one-liner about the checkout line is: "Standing closer to me in line will not get you to the checkout faster." "Dear person behind me in the checkout line,Standing closer to me is…
Piano District (Mott Haven, Bronx)
The South Bronx (in the Mott Haven area) was known for piano manufacturing in the early 1900s. In 2015 -- long after the piano manufactures left -- Keith Rubinstein, a real estate developer and…
“I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears, people just say I was killed by bears”
If you choke on gummy bears, are you "killed by bears"? "The only good thing about choking to death on gummy bears is that your family can say you were killed by bears, which sounds…
“I’ll be Irish in a few beers”
"I'll be Irish in a few beers" (a pun on "in a few years") is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on several images. "Let everybody know you're ready…
“Why do Native Americans hate snow?”/“Because it’s white and settles on their land.”
A riddle about Native Americans is: Q: Why do Native Americans hate snow?A: Because it's white and settles on their land. The joke was first posted on Reddit -- Jokes on April 9, 2015 and has…
“The most amazing thing about the internet is how it allows you to do nothing with your life”
American comedian Jake Weisman posted on Twitter on November 3, 2013: "The most amazing thing about the internet is how it allows you, with the click of a few buttons, to do absolutely nothing…
“Why did the leprechaun cross the road?”/“He wanted to reach the pot of gold faster.”
A leprechaun riddle is: Q: Why did the leprechaun cross the road?A: He wanted to reach the pot of gold faster. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2003. “When does the leprechaun…
“I found a hole in my trainer that’s big enough to put my finger through” (joke)
A pun about "trainers" (sneakers) has been printed on several images: "I found a hole in my trainer that's big enough to put my finger through. One formal complaint from her,…
“Did you hear about the man who wanted to sound Irish? He decided to go for brogue!”
"Brogue" sounds a little bit like "broke." A St. Patrick's Day pun is: "Did you hear about the man who wanted to sound Irish? He decided to go for brogue!" The…
“What did St. Patrick say to the snakes?”/“He told them to ‘hiss off!’”
A St. Patrick's Day joke about Saint Patrick is: Q: What did St. Patrick say to the snakes?A: He told them to "hiss off!" The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001.…
“What did the husband do after forgetting his wife’s birthday?”/“Cauliflower shop!”
"Cauliflower" sounds like "call a flower." A riddle is: Q: What did the husband do after forgetting his wife's birthday?A: Cauliflower shop! A "cauliflower shop"…
“What did the hot dog say when he crossed the finish line?”/“I’m the wiener!”
A hot dog "wiener" pun is: Q: What did the hot dog say when he crossed the finish line?A: "I'm the wiener!" The joke has been cited in print since at least 1992. 8 March…
“What do you get if you cross a sweet potato and a jazz musician?”/“A yam session!”
A yam riddle is: Q: "What do you get if you cross a sweet potato and a jazz musician?A: A yam session> The joke has been cited in print since at least 1996. 24 December 1996, Chicago (IL)…
“What do you get if you cross a sweet potato and a jazz musician?”/“A yam session!”
A yam riddle is: Q: "What do you get if you cross a sweet potato and a jazz musician?A: A yam session> The joke has been cited in print since at least 1996. 24 December 1996, Chicago (IL)…