"All the coffee in Colombia won't make me a…

“All the coffee in Colombia won’t make me a morning person” is a jocular one-line coffee saying that has been printed on many images. “All the coffee in Columbia can’t make me a morning person” was posted on the newsgroup rec.games.chess.politics on March 6, 1996.

“There’s not enough coffee in the world…” and “(Not for) All the tea in China” are related sayings.

Wikipedia: Coffee production in Colombia
Coffee production in Colombia has a reputation as producing mild, well balanced coffee beans. Colombia’s average annual coffee production of 11.5 million bags is the third total highest in the world, after Brazil and Vietnam; though highest in terms of the arabica bean. The beans are exported to United States, Germany, France, Japan, and Italy. Most coffee is grown in the Colombian coffee growing axis region. In 2007, the European Union granted Colombian coffee a protected designation of origin status. In 2011 UNESCO declared the “Coffee Cultural Landscape” of Colombia, a World Heritage site.

Google Groups: rec.games.chess.politics
02/96 USCF Policy Board Meeting
Alan Losoff
3/6/96
(...)
All the coffee in Columbia can’t make me a morning person!

Google Groups: alt.castlenet
The Joys of Java
The BEAST
4/4/02
No…....the *caffeine* kind of Java!!
1.. Take time to smell the coffee.
2.. With enough coffee, anything is possible.
3.. Instant human. Just add coffee.
4.. All the coffee in Columbia won’t make me a morning person

Google Books
e-Jeanne: 2004 (Part One - January through June)
By Jeanne Halsey
Lulu Publishing (Lulu.com)
2004
Pg. 433:
THE LAST WORD
All the coffee in Colombia won’t make me a morning person. – Anonymous ~ Contributed by Amy Wallace

Twitter
Timothy Griffin‏
@Timmargh
Got bought a fridge magnet today: “All the coffee in Columbia won’t make me a morning person”. It’s so true it makes me sad :^( ... see?
5:02 PM - 28 Feb 2008

Twitter
Heather Kittredge‏
@TheGeeksWife
Been up for an hour already, and I can’t say I’m real happy about that. Grr. All the coffee in Colombia won’t make me a morning person.
8:46 AM - 24 Mar 2008

Twitter
Twila Marie‏
@twila_zoned
all the coffee in Columbia will NOT make me a morning person
4:36 AM - 2 Aug 2008

Google Books
Chuckle, Giggle, Snort!
Quips Collected By Karen Money Williams
Lulu Publishing (Lulu.com)
2013
Pg. ?:
Morning:
All the coffee in Colombia won’t make me a morning person.

Google Books
Wherever She Goes
By ReGina Welling
Willow Hill Books
2015
Pg. ?:
Kat started to rise but Gustavia insisted, “I’ll pour you a cup, I need to check on breakfast anyway,” and went to pick out a novelty mug with all the coffee in the world won’t make me a morning person printed on it.

Google Books
Better Get To Livin’
By Sally Kilpatrick
New York, NY: Kensington Publishing Corp.
2016
Pg. ?:
“Sure.” I poured a finger of bourbon into the mug that said, ALL THE COFFEE IN COLOMBIA COULDN’T MAKE ME A MORNING PERSON.