“I’ve bean thinking about you a latte”
"I've bean thinking about you a latte" is a jocular coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "I've bean thinking about you a latte" was posted on Twitter by…
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“What do you call a polite man who builds bridges?”/“A civil engineer.”
A "civil engineer" isn't necessarily polite, but there are jokes. "What do you call a really nice person who builds bridges? A civil engineer" was posted on twitter by…
“What is a chiropractor’s favorite type of music?”/“Hip-pop.”
"Hip-pop" is a music portmanteau of "hip-hop" and "pop." "If I were a chiropractor, I’d listen to HIP-POP! GET IT?" was posted on Twitter by Matthew Inman…
“It’s harder to defend a title than it is to win it”
It's often said in sports that it's harder to defend a title than it is to win it. The origin of this saying is unknown. "This may be due partly to the fact that it is frequently…
“If you were a vegetable, you’d be a rudeabaga”
"If you were a vegetable, you'd be a rudeabaga" (rude + rutabaga) is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "If you were a plant you'd be a…
“Why did the coffee file a police report?”/“Because it got mugged.”
A coffee riddle -- with a pun on the word "mug" -- was posted on Twitter by River Market on July 24, 2014: Q: Why did the coffee file a police report?A: It got mugged. A slightly…
“What kind of vegetable has the worst manners?”/“A rudeabaga.”
"If you were a vegetable, you'd be a rudeabaga" (rude + rutabaga) is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "If you were a plant you'd be a…
“What do you call a mean vegetable?”/“A rudeabaga.”
"If you were a vegetable, you'd be a rudeabaga" (rude + rutabaga) is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "If you were a plant you'd be a…
“Scrambled eggs should be spelled dcrbmlaes gegs”
"Scrambled eggs should be spelled dcrbmlaes gegs" -- that is, scrambled -- is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. The saying was posted on Twitter by Lindsay on…
“Why did the pilot blush?”/“Because he saw the airstrip.”
"Airstrip" shouldn't be confused with "air strip," but there are jokes. Sometimes the airplane blushes and sometimes the pilot blushes. "Mrs. Sehmi: Why did the…
“What do you call an Irishman hanging from the ceiling?”/“Sean D’Olier.”
"Chandelier" isn't an Irish word, but there are several Irish puns. "Q. What do you call an Irishman hanging from the ceiling? A. Sean de Lier" was posted on the newsgroup…
“If we go to prison for downloading music, I hope they separate us by genre”
"If we go to prison for downloading music, I hope they separate us by genre" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "If someday we all go to prison for downloading…
“Men have feelings, too. For example, we feel hungry”
"Men have feelings, too. For example, we feel hungry" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Says men have feelings too...hunger for example" was posted on…
“Men have feelings, too. Sometimes we feel thirsty”
"Men have feelings, too. Sometimes we feel thirsty" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Men have #feelings too: Thirst" was posted on Twitter by chkchkchk…
“I turn coffee into tax returns”
"I turn coffee into tax returns" is a jocular tax season saying that has been printed on many images. The speaker is a tax preparer who needs coffee to function. "I turn coffee into…
“I’m not a big fan of archery. It has too many drawbacks”
"I'm not a big fan of archery. It has too many drawbacks" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. The joke originated on the website Pun of the Day on June 13,…
“What do you call an Irishman who won’t stop bouncing off the walls?”/“Rick O’Shea.”
The word "ricochet" is sometimes punned into the Irish name "Ric/Rick O'Shay/O'Shea." "What do you call an Irishman who always returns? Rick O'Shay" was…
“I taught my daughter what the word ‘bargain’ meant” (joke)
"I'd like to thank the person who taught me the meaning of the word 'bargain', it means a great deal" was posted on Twitter by Spocksgoat on December 17, 2014. A form of…
“Coffee is so popular, it’s had an entire line of tables named after it”
The popularity of coffee gave us the term "coffee table." "Besides Coffee, what other drink has a table named after it" was posted on Facebook by Coffee City USA on February 2,…
“I tried to force-feed our son when my wife said, ‘Use the fricking spoon. You’re not a Jedi’”
"Force-feeding" doesn't involve the "Force" from the