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September 19, 2022
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago it took 2 people to carry $10 worth of groceries”

A popular inflation joke has needed inflated numbers, from $10 to $100. "A friend of this column thinks Americans are getting stronger as the years go by. As proof, he points out that back in…

September 10, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An acid and a base walk into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A chemistry version is: "An acid and a base walk into a bar. The police later arrested…

August 5, 2022
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An after-dinner speech—‘Check, please’”

"Check, please!" is what a restaurant diner tells a waiter or waitress. The diner is finished eating and wants to pay for the meal. "Check, please" was printed in The…

June 1, 2018
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An allusion walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An allusion version is: "An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol…

February 23, 2016
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An amnesiac walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A popular version includes a variation of a classic pick-up line: "An amnesiac walks…

June 30, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An anagramist walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A anagramist version is: "An anagramist walks into a bar, and the bartender says,…

June 14, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An anteater walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." Anteaters have long noses, and there are three joke versions. "Also...an anteater…

October 22, 2016
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An aposiopesis walks into a—” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An aposiopesis version is: "So, an aposiopesis walks into a——but I’d best not…

September 16, 2022
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An Apple fan walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A version about a fan of Apple products is: "An Apple fan walks into a bar.... Orders…

June 15, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An attractive woman took a seat next to me at a bar…” (joke)

An all-too-real bar joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on June 14, 2017: "An attractive woman took a seat next to me at a bar last night...and brought it to a table of friends." Reddit --…

February 27, 2019
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An Australian marsupial hops into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A marsupial version is: "An Australian marsupial hops into a bar and the barman says,…

November 5, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An eel walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A eel version is: "An eel walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Back for more,…

February 22, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An ego and a superego walk into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Freudian version is: "An ego and a superego walk into a bar. The bartender says,…

June 29, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An elf walks into a bar. A dwarf walks under it” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An elf version is: "Two elves walk into a bar. The dwarf laughs and walks under…

June 29, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An elf walks into a bar. A hobbit walks under it” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An elf version is: "An elf walks into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under…

September 7, 2018
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An empty bottle walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An empty bottle version is: "An empty bottle walks into a bar. The bartender says,…

December 24, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An English teacher walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A teacher version is: "A teacher walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Can I buy…

August 25, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." "An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar..." is one popular…

April 18, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman don’t walk into a bar” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." However, during the 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic, most bars were closed. The joke was:…

April 18, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. Those were the days” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." However, during the 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic, most bars were closed. The joke was:…

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About the Website and Editor

BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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