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November 23, 2010
Food/Drink

“How many cooks does it take to stuff a turkey?” (joke)

"How many cooks does it take to stuff a turkey? One, but you really have to squeeze him in!" The turkey-stuffing joke -- included in many Thanksgiving joke collections -- has been cited…

June 15, 2017
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?”/“None. They just beat the room for being black.”

A "racist police" riddle has been printed on many images: Q: How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?A: They don't. They arrest the lightbulb for being broke and beat the…

December 29, 2017
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“How many cops does it take to throw a black guy down the stairs?”/“None. He fell.”

A "joke" has it that law enforcement officers beat up a suspect, then lie about it: Q: How many cops does it take to throw a black guy down the stairs?A: None. He fell. "Q: How many…

November 27, 2014
Food/Drink

“How many cranberries grow on a bush?”/“All of them.”

A popular cranberry riddle (often included in Thanksgiving joke collections) is: Q: How many cranberries grow on a bush?A: All of them. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2008.…

January 14, 2017
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“How many dance instructors does it take to change a light bulb?”/“Five!...Six!...Seven!...Eight!”

A popular dancer "light bulb" riddle is: Q: How many dance instructors dies it take to change a light bulb?A: Five!...Six!...Seven!...Eight! The joke has been cited in print since at…

January 10, 2018
Buildings/Housing/Parks

“How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb?” (riddle)

A popular "lightbulb joke" about divorced men is: Q: How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb? A: Who cares? They never get the house anyway. This version was posted on…

August 9, 2018
Names/Phrases

“How many donkeys are there in NYC?”/“Five burros.”

New York City had five boroughs. It's sometimes joked that New York has five burros. A restaurant in Forest Hills, Queens, called "5 Burro Cafe" opened in 1990. "The Five…

January 2, 2017
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?” (riddle)

A "lightbulb" joke about feminists is: Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A: One. Men can be feminists, too. The riddle was posted to Reddit -- Jokes on August 16,…

December 12, 2017
Education/Schools

“How many frat boys does it take to change a light bulb?”/“None, they prefer natural light.”

There have been several versions of fraternities and beer in the traditional lightbulb joke. This is from 1984: Q: How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: Three: One to screw it…

December 12, 2017
Food/Drink

“How many frat boys does it take to change a lightbulb?”/“None, they prefer Natural Light.”

There have been several versions of fraternities and beer in the traditional lightbulb joke. This is from 1984: Q: How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: Three: One to screw it…

November 13, 2020
Sports/Games

“How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?”/“FORE!”

A golf version of the popular lightbulb joke is: Q: How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?A: FORE! The riddle was posted on the newsgroup eunet.jokes om September 5, 1994. Golfers…

November 13, 2020
Sports/Games

“How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?”/“FOUR, but they wrote three.”

A golf version of the popular lightbulb joke is: Q: How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?A: FORE! The riddle was posted on the newsgroup eunet.jokes om September 5, 1994. Golfers…

January 14, 2021
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“How many good cops does it take to change a light bulb?” (joke)

Entry in progress -- BP TwitterSal the Agorist@SallyMayweather(A meme shows a comic saying these lines. -- ed.)HOW MANY GOOD COPS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?I'LL LET YOU KNOW AS SOON…

February 20, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“How many good cops does it take to change a light bulb?” (riddle)

Some people argue that there are no good cops -- and if there are a few good cops, they are powerless to change anything in the system. A joke reinforces this. " "Here's one. How…

March 9, 2016
Food/Drink

“How many guacs are in a bowl of guacamole?”/“Avocado’s number.”

"Avogadro's number" sounds like "avocado's number," prompting the math joke: Q: How many guacs are in a bowl of guacamole?A: Avocado's number. The pun was cite in…

January 26, 2023
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“How many guitars does a guitar player need?”/“Just one more.”

A guitar player often likes to have many guitars. "How many guitars does a guitar player need? Just one more" is a popular joke that has been printed on many images. "Q. How many…

January 26, 2023
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“How many guitars does a guitarist need?”/“Just one more”

A guitar player often likes to have many guitars. "How many guitars does a guitar player need? Just one more" is a popular joke that has been printed on many images. "Q. How many…

July 28, 2016
Food/Drink

“How many hamburgers can you eat on an empty stomach?” (riddle)

A popular food riddle is: Q: How many hamburgers can you eat on an empty stomach?A: One. After that, your stomach isn't empty. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1849, when it…

August 12, 2016
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?” (joke)

A popular series of jokes titled "Variation of a lightbulb theme" was posted by Roger Wells on net.jokes on July 24, 1982: How many hardware engineers does it take to change a…

August 11, 2019
Work/Businesses

“How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb?”/“Why does it have to be a group activity?”

A introvert version of the lightbulb joke is: Q: How many introverts does it take to change a lightbulb?A: Why does it have to be a group activity? "'How many introverts does it take to…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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