“Born Free, Taxed to Death”
"Born Free, (But) Taxed to Death" is a common anti-tax slogan, found on T-shirts and bumper stickers. The saying has been cited in print from at least 1974 and has been popular in…
“Born on third base and thinks he hit a triple” (a privileged person)
Texas politician Jim Hightower told the Democratic National Convention at Atlanta, Georgia, on July 19, 1988, about the Republican presidential candidate, George H. W. Bush: "He is a man who…
“Born, raised and protected by God, guns, guts & glory”
"Born, raised and protected by God, guns, guts & glory" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "god, guns, guts and glory .sig snipped" was posted on the…
“Boss makes a dollar. I make a dime. That’s why I crap on company time”
"Boss makes a dollar. I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time" is a work rhyme that has been printed on many images. "the boss makes a dollar, while I make a dime,…
“Boss makes a dollar. I make a dime. That’s why I poop on company time”
"Boss makes a dollar. I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time" is a work rhyme that has been printed on many images. "the boss makes a dollar, while I make a dime,…
“Boss makes a dollar. I make a dime. That’s why I shit on company time”
"Boss makes a dollar. I make a dime. That's why I poop on company time" is a work rhyme that has been printed on many images. "the boss makes a dollar, while I make a dime,…
“BOSS spelled backwards is double-SOB”
"BOSS spelled backwards is double-SOB" ("SOB" is "son of a bitch") is a humorous one-line saying that has been cited in print since at least 1957. Reader's Digest…
“Boss told me to leave my problems at the door when I come to work, so I asked him to stand outside”
"I got fired yesterday. My boss told me to leave my problems at the door when I come to work. So I told him to go stand outside..." was posted on Twitter by Study of Awesomology on June…
“Boss, can I have a week off around Christmas?” (joke)
A workplace joke was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on May 14, 2019: "Boss, can I have a week off around Christmas?"Boss: It’s May."Sorry. May I have a week off around…
“Boss: ‘You missed work yesterday, didn’t you?’ Me: ‘Not particularly.’”
A pun about "missing" work is: BOSS: You missed work yesterday, didn't you?ME: Not particularly. "Foreman: 'You missed work yesterday, didn't you?' Pitman:…
“Boss: Why are you late?”/“Me: I got drunk last night and set my calculator to $5.30.”
"I’m late for work because I got drunk last night and set my calculator for $5.30" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Im Late For My studio session Because…
“Boss: Would you be able to pass a urine test? Me: No problem. Distance or accuracy?”
A "urine test" is a test of what's in the urine -- not how a person can produce urine. "At my last pee-in-cup urine test, I asked the doctor if he wanted me to emphasize…
“Boss: You should have been here at 8:30! Employee: Why, what happened at 8:30?”
An employment joke about a late employee is: Boss: You should have been here at 8:30!Employee: Why? What happened at 8:30? The joke was printed in many newspapers in 1935. 20 March 1935, San Diego…
“Boss: You were gone 7 hours to smoke? Me: It was a brisket.”
Some employees take smoking breaks -- usually for cigarette smoking. A joke was posted on Instagram by iamyarddad on October 26, 2023: "Boss: You were gone 7 hours to smoke? Me: It was a…
“Bosshole (noun): A person who turns into an asshole ten seconds after being made Supervisor”
"Bosshole" (boss + asshole) is a portmanteau word that has been printed on many images. "TO The Best Little Bosshole in Town! From Docs "R" us" was a Valentine's…
“Both the Democrat and the Republican are running for president of Ohio”
The Democratic and Republican presidential candidates ignore states where the election is not in question and spend almost all of their time in contested or "battleground" states. The…
“Both X and SpaceX are moving to Texas and not ONE JOURNALIST went with the headline ‘All My Xes Live In Texas?’”
Businessman and investor Elon Musk announced in 2024 his intention of moving his companies X (formerly called Twitter) and SpaceX to Texas. "Excuse me -- both X and SpaceX are moving to Texas…
“Botox is a performance-enhancing drug for poker players”
"Pokertox" (poker + Botox) was introduced by a New York doctor in 2012. Botox injections to a poker player's face would stop that player from a facial reaction to the cards.…
“Bottled water companies don’t produce water, they produce plastic bottles”
"Bottled water companies don’t produce water, they produce plastic bottles" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Reddit -- Showerthoughts on…
“Bottomless breadsticks implies the existence of topless breadsticks”
A "bottomless" cup of coffee is a coffee with free refills. There are jokes with the Olive Garden restaurant serving bottomless/topless breadsticks -- that is, unlimited breadsticks.…