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May 25, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you let social media get to you, I can only imagine what real life does to you”

Many people take social media much too seriously. "If you let social media get to you i can only imagine what real life does to you" was posted on Twitter by Shiloh_ on August 9, 2017.…

September 30, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you scroll down far enough, we’re all on the front page”

Web developers seek to place things on the "front page," but sometimes that page scrolls down for a long, long while. "If you scroll down far enough, is *everything* on the Front…

August 21, 2013
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you sleep with the elephants, you can’t cover the circus” (journalism adage)

"If you sleep with the elephants, you can't cover the circus" has developed into a newspaper adage. In 1977, it was discovered that New York (NY) Times writer Laura Foreman had been…

March 21, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun…”

Should a last post before a social media sabbatical leave some intrigue? "If you take a twitter sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last tweet something fun like 'I wonder if…

March 21, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you take a Twitter sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last tweet something fun…”

Should a last post before a social media sabbatical leave some intrigue? "If you take a twitter sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last tweet something fun like 'I wonder if…

July 1, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my posts are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a social media saying that has been printed on many images. "if you think my posts are…

July 1, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my posts are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a social media saying that has been printed on many images. "if you think my posts are…

June 21, 2023
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think my tweets are ridiculous, you should see my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my tweets are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a Twitter saying. "If you think my tweets are ridiculous you should see my life…

June 21, 2023
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think my tweets are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my tweets are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a Twitter saying. "If you think my tweets are ridiculous you should see my life…

February 22, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think patience is a virtue, try surfing the net without high speed internet”

"If you think patience is a virtue, try surfing the net without high speed internet" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "If U still think Patience is a Virtue,…

July 1, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think some of my posts are ridiculous, you should see my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my posts are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a social media saying that has been printed on many images. "if you think my posts are…

July 1, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think some of my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my posts are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a social media saying that has been printed on many images. "if you think my posts are…

June 21, 2023
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think some of my tweets are ridiculous, you should see my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my tweets are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a Twitter saying. "If you think my tweets are ridiculous you should see my life…

June 21, 2023
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you think some of my tweets are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices”

"If you think (some of) my tweets are ridiculous, you should see (some of) my life choices" is a Twitter saying. "If you think my tweets are ridiculous you should see my life…

February 12, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you unfriend me and later send another friend request, there will be a $29.99 reconnection fee”

"If you unfriend me and later decide to send me another friend request, there will be a $29.99 reconnection fee" is a jocular social media saying that has been

July 12, 2014
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you want something in the paper, that’s advertising; you want something kept out, that’s news”

"Whatever a man wants published is advertising; whatever he wants kept out of the paper is news" is an old newspaper saying of unknown authorship. The following appears to have been…

October 7, 2024
Government/Law/Military/Religion /HealthMedia/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you want to know who the bad guys are, it is the side who wants you arrested for memes and jokes”

"If you want to know who the bad guys are, it is the side who wants you arrested for memes and jokes" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The meme was posted on Facebook by…

May 12, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you wrote a screenplay about coffee, would it be a JavaScript?”

"JavaScript" is not a screenplay about coffee, but there are many puns. "Javascript (which I thought was a screenplay about coffee)" was posted on the newsgroup Google Groups:…

January 18, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“If you’re looking for a husband, Tinder is the place to be! All kinds of husbands are on there…”

Tinder is an online dating and geosocial networking application. Many women go on Tinder to look for a husband, only to find out that many of the men on Tinder are already married. "If…

July 12, 2025
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/InternetPets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)Work/Businesses

“If you’re petting a small dog in your lap, it’s important to let everyone else in the zoom meeting know…”

A joke about zoom meetings was posted on X/Twitter by Matty on January 8, 2021: "If you are petting a small dog in your lap, it is important to let everyone else in the zoom meeting know what…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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