When a man gets married, he often discovers that he is wrong about everything. A joke was posted on Twitter by Josh on June 10, 2015: "Before I got married I didn't even know there was a…
"Before I have coffee, everyone is an asshole. After I have coffee, everyone is still an asshole, but I have coffee" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Before I have…
"Before you lose your shit, remember there's no wine in prison" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Before you lose your shit remember there’s no wine in…
"Behind every successful person is a substantial amount of coffee" (or "Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee") is a coffee saying that has been…
"Being a parent is like jumping out of a plane with a bunch of people who don't know how to open their own chutes. So, you fly around doing it for them. Then you hit the ground, but you…
"Being a parent means knowing how to unwrap a candy bar (Snickers) without making any noise" -- that is, having a guilty pleasure without waking the kids -- has been printed on many…
Many people do not like to eat pizza crusts. However, some people reason that they paid for a pizza, so they might as well eat the whole thing. "Not eating crust is some childish shit. If I…
Kitchen counters keep getting dirty. This was posted on X/Twitter by Charlotte E. Rosen on January 1, 2022, and it received over 202,000 likes: "being an adult is just an endless loop of…
There are usually four burners on a stove, but most people have a favorite and use that one more than the others. "Does anyone else have a favourite burner on their stove....." was posted…
"Being drunk with your best friend(s) is the best kind of drunk" is a popular saying on Twitter. "Being drunk with your best friends is the best kind of drunk" was first cited…
"When your left alone in your thoughts...it can become scary" was posted on Facebook by Courtney Sisney-Gaynor on April 17, 2021. "Being alone with your thoughts can be a dangerous…
"If cauliflower can somehow become pizza...then you, my friend, can do anything" is a jocular food saying that has been printed on many images. "If cauliflower can be pizza, we, my…
Ben & Jerry's ice cream -- a very richly flavored, premium ice cream -- is often said to be an anti-depressant, and this has some chemical basis. Ghrelin, called the "hunger…
A popular green tea joke went viral in 2018 and 2019. "3 Benefits Of Serving #GreenTea To Guests : 1 - It'll Prove You're Modern , 2 , Saving The Money Of Milk , 3 , No Need To Give…
A fortune cookie joke was posted on Facebook by Deidrè de Saldanha (and many others) on June 19, 2012: "Best Fortune cookie ever: 'Person expecting sound advice from stale cookie…
“Friends are therapists you can drink with” is a popular saying. "Best friends are just personal therapists who get paid in alcohol" and "Best friends are basically therapists…
“Friends are therapists you can drink with” is a popular saying. "Best friends are just personal therapists who get paid in alcohol" and "Best friends are basically therapists…
“Friends are therapists you can drink with” is a popular saying. "Best friends are just personal therapists who get paid in alcohol" and "Best friends are basically therapists…
“Friends are therapists you can drink with” is a popular saying. "Best friends are just personal therapists who get paid in alcohol" and "Best friends are basically therapists…
“Friends are therapists you can drink with” is a popular saying. "Best friends are just personal therapists who get paid in alcohol" and "Best friends are basically therapists…